#just know there have been multiple murder attempts between the group. it's going well.

[violetvulpini]

A comm for my buddy @morninglarkspur! This piece is for a big crossover the cult has made between our AUs, lovingly dubbed the White Void Crossover.

An Arm for an Arm (red-eyed Rock) is by Lark themself!

Keep the Melody (Blues and Rock) is by @forestlingincorporated

Proto Swap AU (left-hand Protoman, Megaman, and Ruby Spears) is by @wolfoftonight

And Through the Window (the last two) is by me!

If you're interested in a comm of your own, please consider checking out my site!

[andreal831]

Did you ever ship Stefan and Bonnie?

I'm actually so shocked I've never discussed this here because I was obsessed with Stefonnie for the longest time and this post is making me fall back into it.

Stefan and Bonnie had such a beautiful friendship in the early seasons. It was very similar to Caroline and Stefan. I was actually rooting for Bonnie over Caroline initially when it was clear Delena was going to be endgame. I love Steroline, but Stefonnie would have been such an organic friends-to-lovers ship (we know I love a good friend-to-lovers over enemies-to-lovers). Especially, since this was the time Forewood was still going strong and I loved them too. It would have been such a great time in TVD with these ships.

But of course, the writers refused to let Bonnie have everything and eventually shifted Stefan's attention from being split between his two friendships with Caroline and Bonnie to only Caroline. They only ever really get it back in the final season and it was essentially just to rub it in for Bonnie that Stefan, her once friend, murdered her love. This whole storyline was clearly just designed to isolate Bonnie completely from the group. Stefan was supposed to spend the rest of his life making it up to her and then died so we didn't even get to see them repairing their relationship. If they were going to get together, it would have to be before this.

Stefan is the first vampire that Bonnie starts to feel comfortable with after her, very reasonable, hatred of vampires. Because he put in the effort. Even Caroline just wanted Bonnie to get over her fear/hatred without putting in too much effort. But Stefan spent time making her feel comfortable. And the fact that he had Grams approval goes a long way with Bonnie. Stefan on multiple occasions attempts to stop Bonnie from doing dangerous spells that he does want to happen, but he prioritizes her safety. He had so much respect and love for her from the beginning.

Him asking so gently if he can come in and her little nod. This right here shows that their friendship at the bare minimum should have been prioritized. How do you not see romantic potential in this??

Even when he was a ripper, he never harms Bonnie. Or when Stefan and Damon had to kill her mom but Damon does it so *Elena* won't hold it against Stefan. Let's be honest, if Elena can forgive Damon for murdering her brother, she would have quickly moved on from Abby's death. But, to me, it was so important for it not to be Stefan because *Bonnie* never would have forgiven him.

I would have much rathered Stefan getting stuck on the otherside/prison world with Bonnie and repairing their friendship and developing a romantic relationship. Stefan was so protective of Bonnie that it would have given Bonnie a lot more support than she initially got from Damon. I know I am just biased and hate Damon, but I felt like their development was forced. Literally. They never would have interacted like that in other circumstances. I do think Damon needed that friendship, since the only time we see him have any character development is with Bonnie, but that wasn't Bonnie's job. Forcing her to befriend a man she hated, a man who murdered her mom, for his development was just never a favorite story of mine. But Stefan with her would have given her some comfort. I think she also would have had more faith in Stefan coming back for her and saving her if he was forced to leave her behind.

They fit so well together. They both have similar morals and a strong sense of righteousness. They both will sacrifice themselves for those they love and will bend their morals for their loved ones, but at the end of the day they are the heart of the friend group. They also were always trying to stop the other one from sacrificing themselves, understanding that the people the other was harming themselves for wasn't necessarily worth it.

Bonnie deserved to be loved like that. After losing her entire family and everyone she cared about, she deserved to have someone love her the way Stefan loves. And Stefan wanted to be human again. He would have taken the cure and they could have left Mystic Falls behind, coming back for holidays, but getting away from the toxic relationships they had with their family and friends.

As for storytelling purposes, this just shows that the show prioritized ships they viewed would be the most popular (which was based in racism) over the actual storytelling. Bonnie and Stefan has so many similar stories that they could have bonded over, like their summer that no one knew they were missing and their parental issues. But also their history. Elena and Stefan were not the only two reflected in the story with Silas and Amara. There was also Qetsiyah. The full circle story that could have been if they had Silas' shadow-self (Stefan) fall for Qetsiyah's descendant (Bonnie), leaving Amara's shadow-self (Elena). Instead the show spent time forcing parallels by retconning itself with flashbacks.

I loved Bonenzo and Steroline, but if they had done Stefonnie right, it would have been my top ship. They had so much potential to show the development and to actually allow the characters to experience their emotions and work through their trauma. They would have helped each other as friends and fallen in love as they did. They are two of my favorite characters from TVD so it is no wonder I would love them together.

Now excuse me while I go find some fics to read!

Thanks for the ask!

[seiya-starsniper]

Rating: Teen || Chapters: 2/5 || Word Count 3.5k/??

Summary: The Dead Boy Detectives run into a familiar pub while out on a case, and Crystal has to contend with an unfortunate event from her past.

AO3 Tags: POV Multiple, Hob Gadling gives live advice to a bunch of teenagers, while helping them solve cases, that's it that's the fic, also he maybe plays matchmaker for his hot mess bestie

Chapter 1

Read Chapter 2 below, or using the link above on AO3!

--------------

Hob Gadling considers himself to be a rather open minded man. He's lived hundreds of years, and seen thousands of strange and unusual things in that same amount of time, so the chances of something catching him completely off guard are rather slim in the year 2024.

The last few days, however, have proven that there are still many, many things that can surprise him. 

One of those things being one Charles Rowland, who is currently waving at Hob from the entryway of the New Inn.

Hob normally doesn't like to get involved in anything having to do with the supernatural, and especially not anything related to the type of work that Edwin and Charles do. He'd met them purely by chance after some asshole with delusions of grandeur had tried to frame him for a series of murders. He’d sent Edwin and Charles on a wild goose chase in a poor attempt to cover his own tracks.

Hob thought that once they caught the real murderer together and cleared things up, that would be the end of things. But then, Hob kept getting involved in their cases over the years, all of them entirely on accident. Eventually, somewhere between the fourth and fifth poltergeist, Hob decided he might as well figure out how to defend himself against supernatural entities, and maybe make himself useful for these poor boys too. They certainly needed all the help they could get.

Hob had been glad to hear that Edwin and Charles had recently gotten some sort of amnesty in exchange for continuing to help ghosts and other souls move on. It was good work, what these boys did. Hob has seen ghosts that haunted the same places for centuries finally be to pass on into the afterlife thanks to them. And now, they not only had permission to keep going, but had gotten more help to do it too.

The addition of Crystal to their little crew had been a surprise, and Jenny an even bigger surprise, though the latter seems less interested in solving cases, and more in making sure Crystal doesn't get herself killed in the process.

Still, Hob's only ever seen the teens all together in some sort of group, never alone, and he's definitely never seen Charles without Edwin. From the moment Hob had first met the two ghost boys, they’d always been a singular unit in his mind. And yet here Charles was, alone and looking strangely expectant while trying to appear casual as he waits for Hob to close out the tabs on the last remaining lunch hour patrons.

“Everything all right?” Hob asks when Charles approaches him once his last customer leaves. 

“Of course!” Charles answers, his signature smile bright on display. “I was just in the neighborhood and wanted to say hello. And to thank you again for the assist the other day.”

As a ghost, Charles is technically always in the neighborhood, so Hob knows that that’s not all that there is to his visit. It also hasn't escaped Hob's notice that Charles specifically picked the one day Jenny wasn't working the kitchen this week to drop by the pub. He clearly doesn’t want anyone to know that he’s here.

But Hob knows by now how to deal with skittish teenagers. Even dead ones.

“Well I'm almost done here and then I'm gonna head upstairs for a cuppa,” Hob says. Mark’s going to be here soon to relieve me of duty. Happy to have some company if you have the time to spare for an old man.”

“Oh! Yeah sure, I'm not busy,” Charles says, and cute that he’s still trying to pretend that he hadn’t come here with a purpose, when his eagerness is so clearly written all over his face. “Don't need any food though, as you know.”

“Sure, sure,” Hob replies, waving his hand dismissively so Charles can head upstairs ahead of him. He's going to make a cup of tea for Charles anyways. The boy always seemed to love the steam that came out of the mugs, even though he’d never admit it out loud.

Mark comes in exactly at 2:00pm, and Hob chats with him for a few minutes, before he clocks out and heads upstairs to his flat above the pub. Charles is already waiting for him in the living room, and Hob immediately sets to the task of warming up some hot water in the kettle and grabbing some mugs for tea.

“So how are things at the agency?” Hob asks as he waits for the water to heat. “Busy as ever, or more so now that you’ve got yourselves a psychic?”

“Definitely busier,” Charles says. “Crystal’s been a massive help with our cases, we're solving them even faster than before.”

“Good,” Hob replies, just as the kettle clicks, letting him know the water is done. “I’m glad she’s using her powers for good nowadays,” he adds as he brings the two mugs over to the couch. Charles looks surprised by the extra mug, but accepts it without a word. Hob doesn’t expect him to drink any of the tea, of course, but as predicted, Charles seems to fall into a trance watching the steam rise out of the cup.

“Thanks for not giving her too much of a hard time,” Charles says when Hob sits down in the recliner across from him. “She’s been really down on herself lately for everything in her past.”

“I can only imagine,” Hob agrees. He knew a thing or two about wanting to reinvent oneself and burning away the past. He’s had hundreds of years to do so after all. In fact, it could even be argued that Crystal was far ahead of where Hob would’ve been had he been in her shoes. The girl he’d met a few nights ago was so different from the one he’d met a year ago in court that Hob would’ve thought she had a twin instead. 

“Seems like you two get along well,” Hob notes after a brief silence has passed. Charles perks up immediately, taking the opening in the conversation.

“We do,” Charles replies, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. “She’s amazing.”

“Yeah? So are the two of you a thing then?” Hob asks, and would you look at that, turns out ghosts can blush after all. 

“I—maybe?” Charles says, his voice pitched higher with uncertainty. “I don’t know, actually. I mean, it's, well…complicated I guess?”

“How so?” Hob asks. He’d suspected there had been something going on between them, it was obvious in their body language, and how they gently teased one another throughout the night after the banshee had gone. Now Charles is talking like a man newly in love and completely besotted.

“Is she giving you mixed signals?” Hob follows up when Charles doesn't answer.

“No!” Charles exclaims, shaking his head. “It’s me really, I’m—I don’t know.” He sighs in frustration and runs a hand through his hair. “I thought for a while that’s what I wanted and then Edwin—” he suddenly cuts himself off, a small amount of panic now crossing his features.

Ah. Now the reason for Charles' visit suddenly makes itself clear. Crystal clear even, but Hob keeps that terrible pun to himself. 

“So Edwin finally told you how he felt about you?” Hob asks, deciding to rip the bandage off now and quell the strange awkwardness in the room. Charles’ head whips up so fast Hob feels his own neck start to cramp up in sympathy.

“You knew ?” Charles asks. “But Edwin said he’d only figured it out when we were in Port Townsend!”

Hob shrugs. “Sometimes, things are easier to spot when you’re not in the middle of them,” he replies. “But it was pretty clear that, at the very least, Edwin considered you the most important person to him. It's not surprising he fell in love with you too.”

“You really think so?” Charles asks. “Because I don't—I’d never really thought about it before, you know? He's my most important person too, but I never thought that we would be more than that. But now that he's said it, I can't stop thinking about it.”

“Yeah?” Hob asks. “Does it bother you that he feels that way?” A shake of the head. Good. “Do you ever think you could return those feelings?”

“I don’t know, and that’s the problem!” Charles cries, his voice pitching near to a whine. He stands and paces around Hob’s living room, and Hob has to try not to laugh into his tea. Teenage problems were always the same, whether a live or dead.

“To be honest, I’m still really into Crystal,” Charles starts, “...but then after everything with Edwin, and what happened to Niko, I started thinking, well, how long will that really last? Crystal’s alive, I’m not. She’s going to—she won’t—she’ll eventually—”

“Grow up?” Hob offers when the teen can’t find the right words. “Grow old, hopefully? Live a fulfilling life with someone else that’s flesh and blood?”

“I—yeah. Ideally yes,” Charles replies, though it's clear the thought bothers him by the way he scrunches his features. “But also, what if us being together puts her in too much danger? What if she—if what happened to Niko happens to her, I couldn't bear it, Mr. Gadling.”

“Hob,” Hob corrects the boy gently. “I've told you before that you don't need to call me Mister anything, makes me feel way older than I already feel,” he adds with a laugh. Charles gives him a half smile and just shrugs helplessly. Some habits were impossible to break, it seemed.

“And those are perfectly reasonable fears to have,” Hob continues. “Crystal is her own person though, and you need to take into account that she might find the risk worth it. And to be honest, I feel like the risk to her life is the same, whether you two are romantically involved or not.”

“Yeah, I suppose you're right,” Charles agrees, flopping back down onto Hob’s couch and staring back into the still steaming mug of tea. “So do you think we should give it a go, then?”

Hob shrugs. “I think you two like each other,” he replies, “but whether you think a relationship is worth it is up to you. Does Edwin know about you two?”

“He knows—some stuff yeah,” Charles replies sheepishly. “I had told him I liked her way before he, you know, confessed to me and all. And like, even afterwards, it seems like he’s fine, but I really don’t know if it’s all actually fine, or if he’s just trying to act like he’s fine just because I look fine but he’s not really fine and what if I’ve mucked everything up or—”

“Hey, slow down, Charles,” Hob interjects, and the boy’s mouth clicks shut immediately. “From what I can see, nothing has changed between you, so I wouldn't worry about it,” he adds, trying to sound as reassuring as possible. “Besides, you and Edwin have been together this long now, you've got more than enough time to sort things out, one way or the other.”

“Yeah,” Charles agrees, his voice now wistfully soft and clearly full of affection. “When we were in Hell, I said that to him,you know. That we have eternity to figure it all out.”

“Did you now?” Hob asks, now smiling himself. “Sounds like you two are on the same page then, as per usual. Now you just need to make a decision yourself and Crystal.”

“Yeah…yeah you're right,” Charles says, seeming to come to a decision. His back straightens and he sits up, his signature smile back on his face. “Edwin and I may have forever, but Crystal doesn't and it's rude to keep a lady waiting right?”

“Absolutely," Hob replies.

Charles leaves shortly after, promising not to overthink everything and let his feelings come naturally to him. Hob is fairly certain he knows where things will land eventually, and he's sure Charles does too. It doesn't make the journey to get there any less worthwhile.

[theramblingsofadork]

Okay—~⭐️!!

I promised I would share about some of my AU for Dr. Starline-or, how things could have gone a bit earlier in his life, and even though I’ve decided to rework a few things to make sure I’m making the story as good as I can make it, here’s a bit of it.

(…WHO AM I KIDDING, THERE’S A LOT OF IT.

But please give it a read anyways! I promise it’s good!)

I don’t really have a name for this AU, yet (if anyone has any ideas, please let me know!) but it takes place before the IDW comics, probably by a few years at least.

⭐️ Premise: Dr. Starline enters a competition of inventors and innovators with the hopes of using it to gain Eggman’s attention, and finds something there that he was not expecting to.

As I have it, Starline is not quite the level of mad doctor we see of him from the comics quite yet.

He’s still poised and a lone wolf, sometimes trying to mimic Eggman in his way of thinking, but hasn’t reached the level of “try to murder hedgehogs with a bomb” or “Operation: Remaster” yet.

So.. still redeemable.

At this point, he’s already attempted to get the Doctor’s attention multiple times over the years, but has had little luck each time. However, this completion has a big tech name backing it, and he expects Eggman will be closely paying attention to it as a result of it. A perfect opportunity to get him on his radar.

While there, he meets Rivet, a sly and energetic cat inventor who he seems to naturally click with. And over the course of the prelims, a surprisingly friendly rivalry grows between them to get into the competition and win the top spot.

⭐️(Side Note: This is because Starline’s not too worried about losing to her, but he admires her tenacious spirit considering her origins were largely non-technological.)

Unsurprisingly, they both get in, and it’s announced that those who made it in are now going to have to form teams. Of course, Starline— having his ego, as well as a reluctance to work with others due to his upbringing being comprised of him being bullied and treated poorly for his interests—isn’t thrilled.

But, not ready to give up his dream yet, he does his usual, “What would Eggman do?”, and decides to team up with people who he thinks might have the most potential and be the easiest to manipulate into doing what he wants.

⭐️ (Side Note: He does not have his hypno glove at this point! That would make things too easy.) (.. Despite him probably having it before the warp topaz in canon. MOVING ON!)

This lands him on Rivet, her brother Charge, a tiny rat named Hex, his bulldog friend Lug, and a firefly named Cello.

Starline assigns himself as the leader of the group, due to his elevated knowledge and experience in the three fields they’re working with— robotics, chemistry, and biology. But as he attempts to get them on board to.. essentially let him run the whole show, tensions and conflicts quickly mount as they begin to push back.

At his wits end after a few days of arguments and fights, he ends up confiding in Rivet and Charge to ask for their insight, seeing as they themselves have been a team for a very long time. The Amp Twins explain to him what teamwork actually is and how to accomplish it, which Starline realizes is a completely foreign concept to him because he’s always worked alone.

Despite his ego hating having to make sacrifices to get this team to work, Starline gives in and takes their advice by changing his tactics. Tracking the team down one by one to talk to them and try to understand why they’re fighting him.

To his surprise, it works! He lets them express themselves and in doing so, discovers that.. these people aren’t so different from him. All of them have great skill, but have been hurt in a similar fashion as he was, and are here, just trying to accomplish their dreams.

The conversations make him sit with his thoughts. He empathizes with them. Encourages them, because that’s what he himself wished someone had done for him. And.. while the depth of his reasoning for doing so is still very much selfish and because he wants to win, he still finds he’s also being.. genuine.

Needless to say, he reluctantly gives up some control to let the others bring their ideas to the table, and his plan works. They all end up working.. surprisingly well together, and even end up teaching him a few things.

Huh. That’s new.

Over the next few weeks that pass, Starline slowly grows more and more relaxed, softening up around the edges as he experiences what having a good supportive group of like-minded people around him is like.

They.. appreciate him. They.. respect him. They treat him well.

And he’s.. not used to this. Not used to people wanting to hear his ideas. Not used to being able to have scientific debates with someone who understands what he’s saying. Not used to being dragged out of the lab by a cheerful purple cat to join her and the others for a dinner in the town. Not used to his smiles being real.

By end of the competition, they’re all quite close as a team, working together in comfortable tandem.

Starline at one point even admits to himself that he actually would consider the group to be.. his friends. They make him feel welcome and appreciated like no one ever has, which is—at the depth of who he is as a character—what he has always wanted and yearned for.

But.. there is still the matter of Eggman.

One thing I want to establish very firmly is that, while Starline opens up more to the others and has moments of being a genuinely sweet person, he is still very much an Eggman fanboy whose dream of working by his side one day has not disappeared.

This is his struggle. His Achilles heel, so to speak.

Because throughout the whole competition, Starline never actually tells the group WHO his inspration is.

They know he has one. They know that’s why he’s here; to gain the attention and recognition of the man by winning the competition. They’ve heard his excited rants about this ‘genius’ and all the brilliant and inspiring things he’s done.

But they don’t know it’s Eggman.

At first Starline keeps his fascination on the downlow, only because he knows he’ll be working with people in the competition who have been affected by the Doctor, and doesn’t want to sabotage his chances of winning. But as he meets the others and gets closer and closer with them, it becomes more about fear and guilt.

He doesn’t want to admit it— Him? Afraid? Guilty?? Never.

But.

What if they were to find out? They’d turn on him for sure. He’d get dumped by the group, just like before when he was growing up. Shamed and left isolated and alone.

Again.

By getting too close, he’s caught himself in a trap. He’s torn between two different lives he could lead. He finds himself slowly beginning to question which one he wants more.

It makes him hesitate when they ask him to form an official team with them after the competition is over. Prevents him from being able to be as open and honest as he might like. Keeps him from being closer to Rivet like he knows they both want.

And even though they know there’s hesitation there, they (particularly Rivet) never stop trying to reach out to him.

Eventually though, the truth does come out and he has to finally make a drastic choice..

…But I think I’ll leave that bit for next time ;)

[cdyssey]

Yellowjackets 2.07 Reactions

CW: Baby Death Discussion/Grief; Suicide Mentions/Attempts; Cannibalism; Cancer

I couldn’t make it thirty effing seconds into this episode without tearing up at these girls staring awake into the darkness, all shattered with grief. Taissa’s right next to Shauna. Of course she is. And Lottie’s right there too.

Oh, my God. She’s still holding the baby.

Her absolute silence. The way she refuses water. Her shrugging off every attempt that Tai makes to comfort her. My heart fucking aches for her.

And she has to bury that wrenchingly small bundle under rocks because the ground isn’t thawed enough for a proper burial. I wanna note here that it was so respectful of the show not to show the baby’s body. We didn’t have to see it to know how tiny and tragic that it was.

“It’s you and me against the whole world.” Goddammit. Because she died with the baby. Literally.

Oh??? A very muted version of the title song?

“I’m sorry, have you two joined a cult since we last saw you, or… / “We are an intentional community. / “What is the intention exactly?” KQQMKQOQJEDIDJSJDJ.

The fucking euphoria I feel at seeing all six adults together.

Nat admitting to the suicide attempt. Shauna’s horrified, “Oh, my God.” Taissa’s broken expression. They love her.

Tai, crying: “I really thought he was going to make it.” I’m so fucked up about these girls.

“But even if the baby made it… for a while… it wouldn’t change the fact that his mother is starving. We all are. I just think it’s time we woke up.” Heartbreaking and so correct. Heartbreaking because its correct.

“That doesn’t sound like you.” And it doesn’t. Van has always been a believer between her and Tai, and even in the group as a whole, but now she’s lost that faith.

“You helped me hear… see… sleep… and I would be dead without you. I need you, Van.” I’m so fucked up. Like, not even five minutes into this episode, I have teared up multiple times.

Natalie being all in for her girlfriend’s wellness remedies AMDMFJSNSNSN.

“All my rational instincts are just kind of, uh, screaming.” SNDNWND. Babygirl chooses self-care. <3 She needs it. She’s been doing hard work this season threatening to skin people and covering up murders.

BABY GOAT!!!

SHAUNA JUST IMMEDIATELY CONVINCED SHE HAS TO SACRIFICE THE GOAT. HELP ME

Bruce, the goat, ily. And it has not escaped my notice that the goat is a boy, and he’s brown, the same color as that horribly small bundle.

Ben is goddamn losing it. The hallucination of Paul is voicing Ben’s greatest insecurity—that he no longer has a place in the cabin. “It’s just time. We all love you, Ben.”

“Um, I would hate for my bladder to guide me into peeing in that thing.” NADIFNSNDNS. Misty’s reluctance to engage with therapies is notable.

LMAO @ HER SNEAKING AWAY. She said, “Nope. Ur not making me confront my deepest traumas today, bestie.”

Misty overhears the girls praising her, and it’s an echo of that moment before she smashes the black box.

MARI ACCUSING HER OF KILLING CRYSTAL. GIRL, MISTY IS GONNA MAKE SURE YOU’RE PITTED.

Misty putting on a performance about looking for “Crystal,” and here’s another parallel—some of Kristen’s last words to Misty were denigrating her for being a bad actor.

“It gave us what we wanted. Shauna lived.” And Lottie’s right here. When Mari prayed to the wilderness last week, she prayed for Shauna alone.

The shot of the girls and Travis holding hands is reminiscent of a team huddle up. 😭

HELP ME WKDNDNDNSND. The girls are, like, well, if she is dead, that, uh, doesn’t entirely suck for us. <3 (I’m sorry. I don’t know which one is Gen and which one is Melissa yet.)

But on a more serious note, this is an interesting beat because it shows that cannibalism in the cabin is not just a “trance-like survival tactic” anymore. It’s something that can be indirectly alluded to when everyone is fully aware of themselves. (We got an inkling of this earlier when Misty and Kristen were discussing Jackie bone broth.)

All that fucking blood. Shauna’s blood.

This Lottie and Tai conversation is so fascinating to me. They’re the two individuals who have had the most interaction with the supernatural—which makes them peers—but the ways they approach their abilities are drastically different. Embrace versus repression. And it’s something we see in their adult selves too.

Adult Tai actually going to Lottie for help about her sleepwalking.

“I need help.” Taissa Turner admitting this is so huge.

“She just doesn’t want to be suppressed. She’s still a part of you, Tai. She will always be a part of you.” Hhhhhhhhhghhhhhhhhhh.

Shauna nearly on the verge of crying in the woods, disassociating and lost.

SHE LOST HER GOAT.

SHAUNAMISTY RISE!!!!

Misty hoarding food is such a good detail. It makes sense after the woods.

“Why did I give one single shit about this goat when Lottie’s goons are just gonna make me kill him?” 😭 MY POOR LITTLE MEOW MEOW IS SO CONVINCED THAT SHE HAS TO KILL THIS GOAT.

have you guys clocked that I’m insane about shauna yet

“Hey, newsflash. I am the only person who took your killing with the seriousness that it required.” YEAH, TELL HER, MISTY!! AND SHE DIDN’T EVEN LISTEN TO YOUR COOKIE ADVICE QOWKDJDNS

“Well, you’re not that innocent either.” / “I know that, Misty. Do you think I don’t know that?” Shauna utterly hates herself, but listen, yeah? They all fucking do. Each and every one of the Yellowjackets.

Shauna is mothering this goat.

“If you think I’m gonna carry you all day, you are delusional, as well as dumb.” ANWKQNDNESN, Melanie Lynskey, I fucking love you.

“I’m not gonna let them eat you, Kristen.” OH, I FUCKING LOVE THIS. YEAH. Sure, Misty may have 100% caused her death, lmao, but she’ll be damned if she lets Kristen be eaten. And I love that she calls Kristen by her real name too, keeping that knowledge alive, even within herself.

The contrast between Shauna/Jackie and Misty/Kristen is big here. Shauna desperately needing to consume Jackie and granting the others the permission to do so too vs. Misty actually kinda being normal for once about what is owed to a body.

Shauna is back in the Jackie shed, and she’s staring at the corner where her body used to be. OH, GOD. SHE’S CALLING OUT FOR JACKIE.

“Jackie, I really need you right now. Please?” SHE’S SO ALONE, AND LOSING THAT BABY IS TIED UP WITH LOSING JACKIE, AND I’M FUCKING UPSET. Those sobs are guttural.

And Jackie won’t come back and haunt her when Shauna calls. Goddamn.

“The kid’s care is entwined with your own.” That’s such a triggering phrase for Shauna and you can see it in her eyes.

“Because it is one thing if I stab this goat later, but there’s no fucking way that it’s dying while I’m supposed to be watching it. So someone is going to make sure this goat is okay. Right now.” She couldn’t save her baby in the woods, but goddamn, she can save this goat.

The tears in Shauna’s eyes as she talks to Lottie. This is all about motherhood to her. This entire season, from the past to the present, has been.

“I’m not gonna kill this fucking goat, okay? Fuck you!” EKWMDNEND

“Wait. Really? I really don’t?” The fucking break in her voice, all the spiraling cracks. Melanie Lynskey is making me cry over a GOAT.

“Oh, Bruce.” AND SHE SOBS.

“I find it gives a person clarity to have to care for something so innocent.” God, God, God, and Lottie knows the significance of that to Shauna specifically.

“I’m not crying about the goat. I don’t really know, um, what’s happening right now. Um, I think it’s just that I’ve always kept my daughter, you know, Callie, like, at arm’s length. I think just out of fear that she would… die, I guess. Or maybe that she was never even real to begin with. I don’t know. I try to tell myself it’s okay. That I’m safe to… to think of her as-as mine, you know, and to just be her mom. But I think something is broken, Lottie. I just can’t do it.”

I’m so fucking unwell about this. I think I’m gonna do a fuller write-up on this moment later, so for now, God, Melanie Fucking Lynskey. And also, that she has this breakdown to Lottie is powerful. In the past, she’s hated Lottie, hated her for trying to encroach on her baby, hated her for becoming their shaman, but here, she confides in her with this terrible pain about motherhood that she’s been keeping inside.

Ahhhh, just a little bit of self-promotion here, but in my Shauna + Callie fic, I was thinking a lot about Shauna’s relationship with motherhood: “But goodness has never come naturally to Shauna, and motherhood is a gaping wound that won’t ever stop bleeding. (A placenta on the dirty floor. So much red, streaming out of her, simply pouring. Don’t you hear him cry? Why can’t you hear him?)” And I think the crux of that, which holds true in this scene, is the fundamental idea that motherhood continually hurts Shauna, and it always goes back to those woods.

CALIGULA AWNIQOWJWKWKWIDJWJDJS.

“OF ANY MOTHERFUCKER WHO GETS IN YOUR WAY.”

THIS IS FUCKING SUBLIME.

GOD, THIS IS WKWKEJWNSJEJKEJD. HELP ME????

“Caligula, when people look at me, do they just see someone desperate for love? Just some murderer?” GOD, THESE TWO QUESTIONS PAIRED NEXT TO EACH OTHER. Desperate love and murder being synonymous with each other.

“How many times did you get the ball over the goal line? Take it from a bird named after a Roman emperor who was also unjustly accused of heinous acts.” SOBBING WKWKKSNWOQOWIEJD

“You are not a murderer, Misty!” HELP ME WOWKWKWKDJWIIEKDJSNSJDJDJD

MISTY’S SUBCONSCIOUS IS REALLY LIKE, “Haha, bestie. You’re soooooo well!! There’s nothing wrong with you at all!!”

Elijah Wood is having the time of his goddamn life aawkdjdjdnwj.

That was so fucking funny. I have no words.

MISTY, THIS VOICEMAIL DKWNDNEN. IT CAN BE TAKEN AS A MURDER CONFESSION.

The human manifestation of her bird named after a Roman emperor was so right. She. Is. Perfectly. Okay. <3

Misty can’t find Kristen’s fucking body. Hhhhh. It isn’t at the bottom of shit cliff anymore. 😭

God. Ben.

He’s been so isolated all season; he feels like that this is his way out.

“Could you just push me off?” So fucking fucked up, but it tracks with what has been going on in his psyche, as well as in the flashbacks with Paul. Ben’s defined by his emotional paralysis and fear. So he’s not acted and just accepted the consequences that come from that. And this is another way of doing that. If he jumps, that’s making an active decision, and that’s fundamentally not what this man does. But if Misty pushes him, it’s just another action that he’s the recipient of and not the doer.

“… if you kill yourself right now, we will eat you.” Jesus fucking Christ. She states it as a fact. It is a fact. The cabin has reached this point.

MISTY TRYING TO FUCKING BLACKMAIL HIM TO KEEP HIM ALIVE. GOD GOD GOD GOD GOD

“I tried so hard to keep the baby alive. I really did.” I’M SO FUCKING UPSET. THE SAME CLIFF WHERE KRISTEN DIED.

Oh, thank GOD, he stepped back. I could not handle losing Coach Ben today.

Tai taking off her wedding ring. Girl ANJQNDNQNWNDNWNSNWNW, you’re such a fail wife.

“I just can’t believe I’m back here again.” / “Making offerings to the dirt.” Man, the wedding ring as an offering.

TAIVAN KISS YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!

YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

But then they both pull back, Tai apologizing profusely.

NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO.

NO

FUCK OFF SHOW NO

NO

NOT MY VAN

NOT MY FUCKING CONSUMMATE SURVIVOR, WHO LIVED THROUGH A PLANE BURNING AND A WOLF ATTACK AND THE WILDERNESS.

NO

I have actual goddamn tears running down my face again. What the fuck is wrong with this show

“Van, what are you telling me?” Van has told her every which way but directly. Taissa can’t accept it unless she hears it.

“I have… months.” I’m sick actually. I’m so sick.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Van. You’re just deciding to tell me now?” Taissa’s first reaction is anger. She lashes out, so goddamn terrified.

And between this and her breaking down to Van a few episodes ago, this is the most emotionally invested we’ve seen Taissa. Her life with Simone and Sammy aren’t real to her—as she’d explained to Shauna last season.

But this is real to her.

Van is real to her.

“This is what it wants—us to be together.” Yeah, me too, Lottie.

“We hurt each other. People died.” God, God, God. They hurt each other. They loved each other. They ate each other. They loved each other.

THE FUCKING ANTLER QUEEN. THIS IS SO FREAKY.

“Does a hunt that has no violence feed anyone?” OH MY FUCKING GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD??????

OH THE THERAPIST ISN’T FUCKING REAL

OH MY GOD

DOES A HUNT THAT HAS NO VIOLENCE FEED ANYONE???????

Van tapping Misty with the bottle. Misty’s being included in the girl circle 😭

TNENFNEND, Shauna taking a huge, ‘ole swig and Taissa smirking at her.

“From Van.” / “Oh, you narc.” AKKQWKJERN

Oh, God. The women are being utterly careless with Nat. Shauna telling her that they should just hang out. Van offering the bottle.

“I lost my goat, but I found him again.” MAQMQKKWKQJEJRNRNEJEJFIEEFEIE

FLORENCE FLORENCE FLORENCW

“I think you should all go home.” Lottie has realized that it’s dangerous that they’re together again.

And the women are like FUCK YOU!! WE BELONG TOGETHER. I LOVE THESE WOMEN

Every time I look at Van now, I wanna cry.

“I think it might be time for you to stop resisting.” This line just made it into 20 new fanfics. <33

LOOK AT MY FAIL WOMEN BEING HAPPY. I KNOW IT’S NOT GONNA END WELL, BUT THEY ALL LOVE EACH OTHER SM. THEY’RE HOME.

THIS FLORENCE SONG.

THEY’RE FREE.

LOTTIENAT GODDAMN CHEEK KISS.

Now they’re having girl talk. 😭

“Does he know?” AAaWjejfuwjjwsj

“He doesn’t have a job, job. He’s dedicated to his passionate pursuit of knowledge.” / “Nice, so where does he go to prison?” ANqKQKWIWWOWJDJS. Van and Tai making little asshole asides is so good, lmao. They do that in the cabin too.

“Well, he wasn’t goth when we fucked.” HELP MEEEEEEEEE. HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

“Was she watching some parts?” WKNWWNQKMWDNWJNEND

I could watch 60 minutes of these women talking like this, lovingly taking the piss out of each other and ignoring all their extensive trauma. <3

Most of the women don’t want to revisit the woods. It’s too hard of a wound for them.

… all of the girls having hazy memories. They know they’ve fucked up; it’s harrowing that they don’t remember the specifics of how.

“Well, if I’m, um repressing things I don’t know about, I am very okay with never figuring it out.” Jesus fucking Christ, that delivery was so sad.

“I mean, compulsive behavior, addiction, disease.” And Van stands up and walks away. She’s more than familiar with what Lottie is saying.

LOTTIE CALLING NAT MADAMMMMMM!!!!!

“Lightning crashes, a new mother cries…” GOD, WHAT A LINE.

VANSHAUNA DANCING!!!

SHAUNA IS FUCKING WEARING JACKIE’S BUTTERFLY SHIRT. I’M SICK. THAT IS SO SICK.

SHAUNA THROWING A PUNCH.

THE GIRLS EXCITED AT SNOW.

“YOU KILLED MY FUCKING BABY.” / GOD GOD GOD.

AND IT’S LIKE, YOU HAVE TO PAIR THAT WITH MISTY’S BREAKDOWN WITH BEN. SHE TRIED EVERYTHING TO SAVE THAT BABY.

“You all fucking ate my baby!” / Shauna can no longer discern reality from a dream. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, FUCK.

LOTTIE STEPPING IN.

LETTING HERSELF BE THE MARTYR.

THE WOMEN HOWLING. THEY’RE PRIMAL. THEY’RE A PACK. THEY’RE WILD. THEY’RE TOGETHER.

“Travis, take Javi to the bedroom.” 😭😭😭😭😭

LETTING HERSELF BE THE WILLING MARTYR.

“Shauna, we need you. Let it out.” MY FUCKING GOD

IT GOES BACK TO THE STEEL MAGNOLIA MONOLOGUE. SHAUNA WANTS TO MAKE SOMEONE FEEL AS BAD AS SHE DOES.

ALL THE GIRLS JUST FUCKING STANDING THERE AND LETTING IT HAPPEN. THEY WON’T INTERFERE. THIS IS RITUAL VIOLENCE.

THE CUTS BETWEEN THE WOMEN BEING SO HAPPY AND THIS SCENE.

LOTTIENAT HOMOEROTIC DANCING.

LOTTIESHAUNA DANCING TOGETHER IN THE PRESENT, AND SHAUNA JUST FUCKING KILLING HER IN THE PAST!!!

LOTTIE IS BARELY RECOGNIZABLE

LOTTIE SHAUNA ADULT HUG. I CAN’T I CAN’T I CAN’T

“Is Callie okay?” Shauna’s immediate goddamn fear when she hears urgent is that her daughter is hurt.

THE FUCKING TORSO.

GODDAMN IT. YES THE TORSO WAS IMPORTANT

MORE FLORENCE YEAH!!

THAT PROMO. WHAT THE FUCK

MARI BACKING AWAY IN FEAR?????

[mybelovedstarlings]

Eternal-Related Theories

Murdoc, Proleus, & The Ulfrangar

So... Murdoc has just been chosen for the position of Proleus' Paladin, as his personal warrior and spokesperson. Proleus is a god of war and supposedly had some kind of warrior group training to become his paladin/serving him as best they could. (The warrior group's existence is evidenced by the temple complex in Aular, which contained living quarters and training grounds, and it was directly stated that there might have been a 'sacred order' living there.) Murdoc's entry into the temple complex is accompanied with an almost immediate feeling of being watched, as he says multiple times. Later, when he is chosen by Proleus, there was little to no hesitation in removing Jaevid, Isandri, Garnett, and Roxus from the Proving Grounds. Isandri states earlier that Proleus values mental and emotional control along with physical prowess. This makes Proleus choosing him a lot more suspicious, because while Murdoc was very well trained, the others are all very powerful and knowledgeable. However, Murdoc was trained by the Ulfrangar, an ancient, powerful, organization known to be the best trained in the world. Proleus also had/has a group of powerful warriors who served him. He's a god of war, so it would make sense if an organization started by him was so powerful. With that in mind, it isn't hard to draw the conclusion that the Ulfrangar were or are Proleus' chosen warriors, with the Zuer as his spokesperson. This would make Murdoc the current Zuer, by rights (and divine power) alone. Despite his status as a former Ulfrangar assassin, he has technically become their leader and re-integrated himself into their world, this time by choice.

Reigh, Maylea, Clysiros, & The Zenith's Call

So Reigh has finally decided to try and make a deal with Clysiros, (risking his sanity again) to try and even the odds between Auguress Riva and their little team. We also know that he made a very dangerous deal with the Zenith's Call (whose motives are mostly unknown) that is very likely to put everyone at risk and might end in betrayals. Maylea is also trapped in the crossfire of this situation, and Reigh is trying his best to protect her and make sure she doesn't have the same traumatizing experiences he did, (going out into the world, being kidnapped, tortured, and experimented on at 17, and then proceeding to suffer in silence after that for 14 years,) and that there's someone there to keep her safe. He's struggling with making sure she doesn't end up like him, which is understandable. (He's miserable, goddammit.) (His attempts at protecting her might be some kind of twisted form of projecting? I guess he sees her situation as a parallel to his own and desperately wants to try and fix his own problems by helping her. Maybe he thinks he'll be able to forgive himself for everything if he makes sure that she doesn't get hurt. He does seem to think that if he can't help people, he isn't a good person.)

Clarke, Avgior, Arlan, & Sadeera

Clarke has been revealed to be Avgior's reincarnation, and has also regained some of his memories by visiting the dragon god's corpse. He is now capable of using some of his former powers, and was able to fight Sadeera head on and survive, which is quite the feat. However, with those memories and powers comes the revelation that Avgior was murdered by a mortal man. When Sadeera attacks Clarke, Noa & Traegan, she has the weapon that killed Avgior, and even uses it to take some of Clarke's blood for a ritual. (Dragon blood is very powerful in rituals, according to Edarix... what would a dragon god's blood do??) Why does she have it? Many centuries ago, Arlan was apparently banished from his homeland of Avora, and whatever event happened before said exile caused him to have nothing but utter contempt for his sister Sadeera. From what Arlan has said, an Avoran elf leaving their home is equivalent to cutting off their very life force, causing them to slowly dwindle away until they are a mere husk compared to the near godlike beings they were before. This would imply that exile is a very serious punishment. What could he have done that was so serious he got kicked out? What about killing a god? Avgior was felled by a mortal man. Arlan was exiled a very long time ago for a crime so serious his people decided to force him to basically cut off his own semi-divinity and live as a regular mortal. (Somewhat) Sadeera, as his sister, would have had access to anything he did, right? It would have been easy for her to take the knife. The only question remaining is why she would want to have it, and that also raises another question; why does she want to become an all-powerful goddess so badly? She seems to have some kind of grudge ("curses only last as long as the gods who inflict them") against the divine, perhaps this is leading her on? So Arlan was exiled for the crime of killing the god of fate and discernment, but did he actually do it? Could Sadeera have framed him? How will Clarke deal with this?

Maylea

Her journey in general has been a thematic parallel to so. many. other. arcs.

Running away to try and help save the world? Jaevid and Reigh both did that, with varying degrees of success. Connecting to a god's powers and doing crazy stuff with it? You can bet someone else she knows has done that too. Currently, much like her uncle, she stands in the shadows of all the men and women who came before her. However, as she is trying so desperately to prove, she is not her father. Maylea is a person all on her own, trying to make a legacy for herself. Her determination to rescue Ronan by sneaking onto the ship, contacting Paligno, and freeing the dragon in the Caldera, is her way of doing that. So far, I'd say she's doing amazing at it, and watching her grow into the capable dragonrider she was meant to be, especially with the final book coming up in a few months, will be captivating. Maylea will no doubt play an important role in rescuing Ronan. Saving him was her goal for coming here, and she won't let that idea go. She will most likely be the person who reaches out to him and sets him free in his darkest hour.

Jaevid, Generational Trauma, & Destiny

So far, Jaevid is having what will probably be the biggest existential crisis he'll ever have in his entire life. His children are being dragged into a war with gods, by the same divinity that started his journey no less, and all he can do is watch. This is the same thing that happened to him during the Gray War, and it probably torments him to know what comes after the wars and divine relations. To know that kind of thing might very well be happening to his kids. So he left home and went to Nar'Haleen to try and stop it, or at the very least lessen the damage. This, as has been proven somewhat by previous books, is probably not a good idea. Jaevid's tale of heroism was not a very happy one. He knows that, and is very clearly trying his best to make sure his kids can have what he didn't. (I'm sensing a theme here...) Paligno, (and all the other gods we've met so far) has a habit of choosing young children to be their speakers. For whatever reason, they prefer the sense of innocence and naivety that comes with choosing a young person. Maylea is mostly unaware of all the terrible things that come with being chosen by a god. However, as many characters have said in the series before, "it's destiny." Therefore, Jaevid trying to stop or protect Maylea in whatever way he can is probably not going to end very well. "Destiny" happened to him, it happened to Reigh, and now it's happening to Maylea. Jaevid is probably very keenly aware of the cycle that's been going on. "Destiny" has left him and Reigh traumatized, and now it's coming for his children. By coming to Nar'Haleen, Jaevid is attempting to end that cycle before it can cause any more harm. Choosing (in some way) to defy the thing that made him and so many others into what they are today. "Destiny" is what made him a legend. It's what helped him and Reigh end the Tibran War. It's what's going to help his daughter make a name for herself here and now. Defying it and everything that comes with it could protect his kids from experiencing life-changing traumas, or it could make everything worse.

[nimblix]

CW: suicide, dissection, etc gruesome stuff

INHALE…

Where do I start??

I’d probably start with backstories??

togami-A side character in an anime, before the whole universes-apocalypse thing. She had a crush on an upper classmate she was friends with. Once the apocalypse started she witnessed her crush become mutilated into a monster. She ended up going on to become a enlister in a group to help save remaining survivors after the whole “day of reckoning”

she often has visions of her old friend distorted, comforting her. She’s the main character, yet the least developed by some miracle

Opal- an old hag (not actually she’s just like 40-) she’s the main villain. She’s from a progressive world where most people go into a field of S.T.E.M.

She majored in engineering, biology, and quantum physics. The way the work places work where she is is that the place they live is connected to their office, and the quality of it depends on your rank in the workforce. For Opal she often fixated on her own quantum physics research and so remained in a low rank. She ended up envying a guy who had recently moved into the workplace. But he only acted kindly towards her and acted interested towards her research. So Opal felt attached to him and they started hanging out. He drove her research into other universes and the evolution of other species. They definitely had an enemies to lovers relation ship, but when he ended up getting promoted to a higher rank Opal was furious. Opal has jealousy issues, anger issues, perfectionism, and is overly manipulative. When he broke the news to her she immediately screamed at him and kicked him out, never talking to him within the next 5-10 years.

After years and years of self isolation, barely doing enough to be qualified for her own work, etc. Opal perfected her research. She figured out how to travel between universes and created a way to do so. It took a lot of trial and error, and there were (a lot) of mangled creatures that came out of it. When it eventually worked perfectly, Ellie ended up coming to opals world. Ellie had previously been used for experimentation to see and test how there could be a possibility of traveling to different universes. She ended up being whipped on over to Opal.

so opals left with this non verbal child she can either discard or take care of, and takes initiative to take her under her wing. On top of opals work and research she now takes care of this child she named Ellie, trying to give her the most attention and nurture she can. She genuinely cares for this kid and immediately switches up around her compared to around other people. Ellie saved Opal from committing her own suicide on multiple occasions as well. This doesn’t mean she was perfect. She’d still have meltdowns and anger fits. She’s just try and limit them or apologize to Ellie.

well moving on, whilst easing Ellie opal is able to get the way to get things from one universe to another to work better. She gets subjects from different worlds and murders and dissects them, researching both inner and outer workings. Seeing how different things evolved or worked. She logs these in volumes and volumes so many things like I can’t even explain it. While doing this Ellie was often locked in a room for hours on end. She published these and starts talking to companies about actually distributing the way she researches other universes. Well, she becomes famous, an icon, absolutely adored. But when companies pick up her inventions they are mal produced And misused. And eventually they cause a horrible catastrophe. They become dangerous, and change the people exposed to them. They become hideous creatures and like whatever the dohickey idk I’m not a fucking scientist I like stories. Well Opal is getting blamed for this, but has no idea. You know that guy she met? He comes to warn Opal that she’s has people coming to kill her or worse. She doesn’t listen though and thinks he’s attempting to hurt her. So she kills him with blunt forced trauma like normal people do. so uh yeah he dies she finds out he wasn’t lying and she basically like locks up as much as possible (Opal now has her own mansion she’s like rich) Opal and ellie now live in their basement and live off of rations for years while Opal does her stupid research.

ellie: She was an unwanted pregnancy, and given up to science to study or use for like organs. Instead she was illegally used in testing for uhhh science stuff idk ist late I’m tired. Anyways you know she gets sent to opals or whatever. She goes through the whole raising thing and lives in the basement-bunker with Opal. She often gets locked in rooms for hours on end while Opal researches, no food or drink. One day opal forgets to lock the door and ellie gets out to ask it eat. Instead she witnesses what opals research truely is. There’s organs in containers, limbs in glass boxes, blood, documents, and Opal dissecting and odd creature. This is hard for both to process and Opal out of a mix of emotions goes to kill Ellie. Ellie being like 8-10 struggles to fight hee off as she tries to stab her to death with a scalpel. She ends up getting her eye stabbed out and Opal realizes what she did. She takes ellie, treats the wound, and not knowing what to do leaves her outside of the mansion to fend for herself.

Unamed wolf pink guy THAT REALLY NEEDS A NAME BUT LIKE NO NAMES FIT THEM: They we’re born and labeled as a “organism from the gods” they we’re cursed by the gods with immortality, and everyone assumed it was because they were blessed by the gods and given an infinite sacrifice. So they were crucified onto the highest mountain surrounding the village to “bless the village. They were the only one to survive the apocalypse. They never truly grew as they were left there at an early age, so they find fun in causing others pain or causing mayhem.

Tumblrs lagging now so that’s all k can write

Needless to say, if anyone has any OCs or OC lore they'd like to share PLEASE reply to this post rambling about them as much as you like, I wanna actually like, ya'know, hear about people's ocs for once. I feel like for a site that says it's so "good for artists" and has posts constantly talking about how great OCs are, there's a sore lack of places for people to actually find each other's OCs.

All I ask is that you check out the book series I'm writing about my own OCs while you're at it!!!

[dothwrites]

13 and 20

13. and 20.--Detective AU and Teacher AU

---

Castiel represses a sigh as he stands up straight. His spine pops as he subtly stretches out the kinks in his aching body.

He'd thought that he was a reasonably fit man, but bending over and scrubbing at filthy floors and tables every day is playing hell with his lower back.

The bell rings, and Castiel curses under his breath as he moves back against the wall. Less than thirty seconds later, all of the doors near him burst open and a flood of teenagers courses into the hallway.

Castiel's had a lot of unpleasant assignments in his life, but going undercover at Carver Edlund High School is among the worst. He thought that he'd seen some of the worst that humanity had to offer: murderers who cared nothing for the pain of their victims, kidnappers who plunged families into turmoil for years, robbers who were willing to kill just in order to get a few quick bucks. But upon seeing the horror show of the cafeteria after a group of freshmen finished lunch, Castiel has to start reevaluating his list of atrocities.

The tardy bell rings, and Castiel sighs as he steps out in the hall. He rolls his eyes at the debris that the students have left behind and grabs his push broom to start clearing it away.

Going undercover at Carver Edlund wasn't Castiel's first choice of assignments, but with several students ending up in the hospital due to drug overdoses, something drastic had to be done. Castiel's job is simple: gather as much intelligence as he can about where the drugs are coming from. If possible, he's to find the dealer and shut the whole production down.

In theory, it's a good assignment. Success here would mean a potential commendation, maybe a promotion if the operation is big enough. But the reality of the situation is much different. Castiel's been masquerading as a member of the maintenance team for a little over a week, and he's no closer to finding the source of the drugs than he was when he started.

His captain had ultimately decided to send him in as a member of the janitorial staff for access reasons: as a janitor, he has keys to every door. Not even lockers are safe from him. There's no place in the school off-limits to him. Unfortunately, it also means that his opportunities for questioning potential suspects are limited: no high school student wants to have long conversations with the janitor. He's reduced to sweeping around gaggles of kids, hoping that they'll just so happen to let something slip.

His plan hasn't worked. So far, he's learned about the latest TikTok challenge, who's rumored to have slept with who, and who on the football team is getting suspended, but drugs? Either these kids are savvier than he gives them credit for, or they don't know anything.

"Oh, sorry, 'scue me... Oh. Hi, Steve."

It takes Castiel just a second too long to respond to the name. Part of that is because he's still not used to answering to his cover name, and part of that is because he's still not sure how to act around Dean Smith.

He braces himself before he turns around, but that still doesn't prepare him for the sight of Dean Smith leaning against the wall. Looking at him is like looking into the sun, if the sun was in a dingy hallway with flickering florescent lights and questionable stains on the floor. Even with those inauspicious surroundings, however, Dean Smith, with his sandy hair, vibrant eyes, freckles, and bright, crooked grin, stands out.

"Hello, Dean." Castiel allows the hint of a smile to cross his face. He'd called Dean 'Mr. Smith' exactly once before Dean had put a stop to it.

"Oh, no," he said, grimacing in distaste, "I get enough of that from the kids. Just Dean, man." Castiel hadn't argued, and the slightly stuffy Mr. Smith became Dean.

"Another beautiful day cleaning up the debris of the world?" Dean gestures towards the small pile of dirt and dust that Castiel has managed to collect.

"It's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it," Castiel answers.

No doubt his superiors would be screaming if they could see him right now. Zachariah, his Captain, would sneer, You're there to catch drug dealers, Novak, not to play nice with pretty boy teachers, but Zachariah isn't here right now. Plus, it's not like Castiel's making any headway on the drug dealers, so he might as well indulge his crush with a guy who's miles out of his league.

Dean is the kind of good-looking that gets noticed by modeling companies in the line at the cafe. Castiel has found himself wondering, more than once, what a guy like him is doing substitute teaching. It's obvious that Dean is smart, and he doesn't doubt that he could have a job doing whatever he wanted. Still, Dean's being a substitute teacher works out well for him, so he doesn't complain. Not if it means that he can be just a little closer to him.

Maybe if Castiel wasn't undercover and wearing an unflattering jumpsuit with the name 'Steve' stitched across the front pocket. Maybe if he were dressed in his customary suit and had a badge and gun to flash around. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

"Don't talk to me about dirty jobs," Dean says, his voice entirely too low and insinuating for the circumstances. Heat blooms underneath Castiel's collar.

"Well, I'm not sure what else to talk to you about," he confesses. He resents the broom handle in his hands.

Dean shrugs. His smile is still carefree, but there's something else in his eyes when he says, "What about any books that you've read lately? TV shows that you've watched?" His eyes flash to Castiel's, and his tongue flirts with his lower lip as he asks, "Restaurants that you'd like to go to?"

Castiel's heart stutters. For a second, it sounded like... But that can't be right. Dean can't be inviting him out. Guys like Castiel don't go out with guys like Dean. That's just the way the world works. Maybe if he was Detective Castiel Novak, but now when he's Janitor Steve.

He takes a second too long to answer. By the time that he's managed to figure out that Dean is serious, Dean's expression has shuttered. He flashes a painfully fake smile at Castiel. "Hey, man, don't worry about it. I'll catch you later, okay?"

He's turning to go, and fear grabs at Castiel. He knows that if he lets Dean walk away, then everything will change between them. No more jokes, no more stolen conversations in the hallways. They'll become nothing more than vague, uneasy colleagues, at least until Castiel's assignment ends and he disappears forever from Dean's life.

The indignity of his assignment and the frustration of his ineptitude rises in Castiel, and bursts out of him in a quick call. "Dean!"

Dean turns around. Hope flickers in his eyes before he hides it. "Yeah?" he asks. The carefully blank tone in his voice is like a knife twisting in Castiel's chest.

"I like Italian food," Castiel answers. He offers a hesitant smile towards Dean, hoping against hope that Dean will accept his overture.

After a second, Dean's smile spreads slowly across his face, as bright as the sunrise. "Yeah," he says, nodding slowly, "yeah, I think we could do that."

---

Dean's heart dances in his chest as he walks away from Steve.

He did it. After weeks of ogling and tentatively flirting, he finally asked out the hot janitor.

Steve is a lot more than a pair of pretty blue eyes and a five o'clock shadow that makes Dean's lip yearn for stubble burn, though. (Though Steve does fill out a jumpsuit better than anyone Dean's ever seen. One day, he was lifting a desk onto the dolly so that it could be moved, and Dean thought his eyes were about to pop out of his skull. Between the thick thighs attempting to pop the seams on his pants, and the biceps rippling, Dean hadn't known where to look.) Steve has a wicked sense of humor, an innate sense of kindness, and he's caught every single one of Dean's literary references (the pop culture ones, not so much. Seriously, who's never seen Indiana Jones?). There's more to Steve than meets the eye, and Dean's itching to peel back the dozens of layers.

He ignores the tiny voice in the back of his head (which sounds like an alarming mix of Sam and Bobby) saying Don't get too involved. This is a temporary thing. Dean frowns and tries to tell the voice to shut the fuck up.

He's only here for as long as it takes him to figure out who's bringing drugs into the school. At the first viable lead, he'll be yanked out, and Dean Smith, substitute teacher, will die, to be replaced by Agent Dean Winchester of the DEA.

Because of the environment, there are multiple law enforcement agencies working on this case. There's state police, the DEA, and maybe even a few FBI agents sniffing around. It's naive to believe that there aren't other agents working in the school, but he hasn't come across any yet that he knows of. He's not entirely sure; he lets Bobby deal with all of the inter-agency bullshit. He has his mission and his cover, and Bobby, as his handler, can navigate every other pitfall.

Beyond small talk and leading conversations, Dean hasn't tried to get close with anyone. Every smiling face could conceal an undercover agent or a dealer. With suspicion everywhere, it's best not to succumb to temptation.

Which makes his attraction to Steve all the more intriguing.

Just thinking of the other man sets off a series of fireworks in the pit of Dean's belly.

This is probably a terrible idea, doomed to failure, but Dean is going to enjoy the ride while it lasts.

Whistling, he goes back to the classroom and prepares for his next class.

[altruistic-meme]

AFTG fic recs

Hi all! I just wanted to share some of my all-time favorite fanfics for aftg, for no real reason other than I want more people to read them and send their love to the authors :) 

Under a readmore because it got. A little long. But please enjoy!

WIPs

Dangerous Habits by LovelyLittleGrim ( @lovelylittlegrim )

Andrew has run into problems while on undercover jobs before. None of those problems were anything like the troublesome runaway that is one Nathaniel Wesninski

Aka: the fic where Andrew is undercover as a hitman for hire and Neil is the guy who hires him. Things get complicated from there.

Undercover Andrew? BAMF Neil? Hitman AU?? Absolutely. I’m in love. The story is just *chef kisses*

Chapters: 8/9

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, past rape/non-con, Drake Spear (who is his own warning), Butcher Neil, 

--

Negotiations by elesary ( @elesary )

This is what Andrew Minyard knows: his brother is dead, killed by a petty Raven prince who has never learned to keep his hands off of Andrew's things. His brother's daughters are his responsibility, a job that is made infinitely harder when their shitty grandparents want custody. Nathaniel Wesninski is a liar, but he might be the only way to avenge Aaron and protect his nieces. All Andrew has to do is watch Nathaniels - Neil's- back as he carves out his own life and identity from everyone who thinks they own him.

Andrew has always been good at upholding his end of the bargain, has he finally found someone willing to uphold theirs?

This fic has got me fucked up, honestly. I’m emotional over it. It’s fantastic.

Chapters: 11/?

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, attempted sexual assault, Butcher Neil,

--

the upper hand by plantelty ( @plantelty  )

Shortly after losing his mother, Neil arrives in the small town of Palmetto, South Carolina, alone in the world and with an impossible plan to carry through.

At the age of eighteen, Andrew ends up helping a boy stage his own death.

-

Just two fucked up boys learning to trust each other during the course of a summer, but also: multiple references to songs, twinyard angst (Nicky tries his best), The Plotting of Neil Josten's Gruesome Demise, and shit hitting the fan in a variety of ugly ways!

The cliffhanger has got me on the edge of my seat, but it is 100% worth the read and the wait for the last chapter!! 

Chapters: 10/11

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Canon typical violence, 

--

The Butcher’s House by Fire_Bear ( @fire-bear )

Andrew thought something was odd with the house the Foxes had to move into after their Athletes' House had been burnt down. He just wasn't prepared for what was actually wrong with it.

For this was a house full of monsters.

Ghost story! Ghost story! Ghost story! I literally think about this fic every other day, it’s fantastic. 

Chapters: 6/?

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warnings: character death (major or minor is unclear), injuries, 

--

Promise of an Unbroken Boy by elesary ( @elesary​ )

Neil is caught by the police with Mary's burning body and is sent to juvie in Oakland where he is assigned to share a cell with one Andrew Doe, who promises him Exy, if only Neil will tell him all of his secrets. With no access to tinted contacts and hair dye, he agrees, it's only a matter of time until he's killed after all. What does he have to lose?

But Andrew's found someone who knows what a promise means, and he'll be damned if he lets that go without a fight.

Ngl this is definitely in my very top favorites -- I LOVE the idea of Neil and Andrew meeting pre-series, and this fic just BLEW my expectations for that plotline out of the waters

Chapters: 14/?

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, Underage, attempted rape/non-con, canon-typical violence, 

~~~~~~~~~

Complete

The Nameless Monster by kanekicure ( @kanekicure )

Nathaniel Wesninski wants nothing more than to see his father dead and buried. But when his father promises him the title of The Butcher, Nathaniel quickly realizes that his destiny of following in his father's footsteps is closer than ever before.

So of course, when he gets forced to go undercover for the Baltimore police, he starts seeing what living could truly be.

-

Andrew Minyard is a newly recruited police officer for the worst precinct in Baltimore, who is dedicated on hunting down the notorious Butcher and his unnamed underling. But when Neil Josten is thrown into his midst as his civilian consultant; he starts to realize some things don't quite appear as they seem.

I love the story telling -- the secret identities, the plotting, everything.

Chapters: 14/14

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Graphic depictions of violence, Butcher Neil, implied/referenced rape/non-con, implied/referenced child abuse, implied/referenced slef-harm (I believe there is a scene that is somewhat detailed on this subject), some characters also get drugged at one point, 

-- 

that’s just something people say by nanatsuyu ( @theoctopusnods )

Neil makes the mistake of stealing the wrong car. Andrew makes the mistake of offering a ride to a liar. They both make the mistake of turning the whole affair into a road trip ‘home.’

Gonna be honest; the summary does not give a big idea as to what is in store and i am SO GLAD I gave this one a try so i’m telling you that you will be too

Chapters: 24/24

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warnings: implied/referenced child abuse, panic attacks (somewhat grahic descriptions of)

--

The Story After You by kanekicure ( @kanekicure )

Andrew Minyard does not understand how Riko Moriyama landed Neil Wesninski.

How the snot-nosed, small dick, rich brat, second son of the Moriyama family who also just so happened to own the largest EXY gear and merchandiser company in the world “RAVEN” - had landed smart mouthed, quick witted, stupidly blue eyed Wesninski, was beyond him. Well, unless Wesninski was a gold digger, but Andrew doubted it.

-

Or; how Andrew Minyard says he doesn't get into messy situations, until he meets Neil and suddenly he is in the most messiest possible situation ever imagined in his life - oh and also, he might be becoming a homewrecker.

Ok I am behind bc I haven’t read the final chapter of this but!! I love the story, it’s very emotional and moving, and I love the characterization in it.

Chapters: 10/10

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Abusive Riko/Neil, abusive relationship, implied/referenced rape/non-con, implied/reference child abuse, implied/referenced self-harm, graphic depictions of violence, some descriptions of injuries/scarring, 

-- 

This Complicated Life by 5a5b5p5 ( @andrewsbutterflyknife )

“This is exactly why I don’t want you and Andrew to meet,” Aaron says grumpily. “You two would get along far too well.”

Neil grins. “I just like pissing you off,” he says, “It’s not my fault your brother does such a good job at it.”

—

Neil doesn’t expect much from his Sophomore year of college, but when he becomes a waiter at the Palmetto Bistro, his life gets a whole lot more interesting. As it turns out, maintaining friendships new and old as well as navigating an interesting relationship with the head chef of the restaurant—who just so happens to be his best friend’s twin brother—is a lot more complicated than he’d thought it would be.

A much more light-hearted fic than most of the others! Includes a secret relationship, and also chef Andrew >>

Chapters: 10/10

Rating: Mature

Warnings: 

--

When I Fade, Keep Me in Your Memory by demesh 

Neil Josten has a secret: he can flicker out of existence.

He can vanish with the turn of a thought; click his fingers, and suddenly he’s not there anymore. Invisible and untouchable, he becomes a living ghost.

Having promised his mother never to let his ability go, Neil teeters the line between faded and real, a person and an echo. He can’t risk getting hurt.

But then, one day, someone sees him when they shouldn’t be able to.

 A (flower-shop) AU about how a faded and lonely Neil finds it in him to become someone real.

Another fic that I need to catch up on ;; but anyway it’s amazing and I love Neil’s ability in it, it’s so well explained and well-written about

Chapters: 12/12

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

Warnings: mentions of past abuse, panic attacks

--

12 Ways to Woo a Minyard by NikNak22 ( @knickknacksandallthat )

Neil is a math nerd who, by a stroke of dumb luck, falls into a group of friends that are the closest thing to family he’s ever had. So, when he tells them about his new mysterious crush, he shouldn’t be surprised how immediately they come up with a plan to help win them over. One they insist that if Neil follows it, he’ll have them falling for him in no time. But things don’t always go to plan – or do they?

Nicky wants to set him up with someone else. Matt and Jeremy are confused but supportive. Allison and Seth offer lewd suggestions, while Dan does her best to keep everyone in line. Jean and Renee know something, Aaron doesn’t really care, and Kevin just wants Neil to join the lacrosse team.

But one thing’s for certain – whether Neil’s successful or not, everyone’s got money riding on this.

The romance-trope-filled fanfic of my dreams. Sometimes you just need a fic of pure joy -- this is that fic. 

Chapters: 14/14

Rating: Mature

Warnings: 

--

finders keepers by moonix ( @annawrites ​ )

Andrew meets Nathaniel through a scavenger hunt app. As their team takes part in a hunt that sends each of them to creepy, abandoned places alone to solve clues and gain points, Andrew and Nathaniel begin a little treasure hunt of their own. The anonymity of getting to know each other in small increments, never meeting face-to-face, allows them a level of intimacy neither are used to. Meanwhile Renee’s friend Neil is acting weird whenever Andrew shows up…

This was one of the first fics I read for aftg!! And BOY what a great start!! All of the little pieces and parts that work together, and just the scavenger hunt itself is fantastic! (I also REALLY wanna know if there is an app like this out there because I would be down to do that)

Chapters: 8/8

Rating: Mature

Warnings: (these all come from the author:) “mentions of historical abuse in a mental asylum, mentions of suicide, mentions of murder and kidnapping, morbid facts, creepy abandoned places including a haunted house at a theme park with disturbing rooms, special appearance of a creepy clown doll, fatphobia and some introspection on body image/complicated relationship with food, mention of self harm scars”

-----

Scared to Live (But I’m Scared to Die) by Major_816 ( @major816 )

Neil Josten goes to the Nest for Andrew, but he stays for a lot more.

~

"I'm sorry Coach," he muttered.

"For what kid?" Wymack shifted. "You've got to give me something to work with here."

Wymack watched the thin traces of sorrow as paper exchanged hands and he was looking down at a contract with the Edgar Allan Raven's.

"I signed them Coach, I'm sorry."

~

The one where Neil doesn't come back from Winter Break.

It is VERY dark, and is one of very few fics that I have actually been almost unable to read one of the scenes, so DEFINITELY pay attention to the warnings -- both these, and the ones provided for each individual chapter. I did go through the fic to collect as many warnings as I could find in the chapter warnings, but be sure to take care of yourself.

Chapters: 36/36

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: rape/non-con elements, implied/referenced rape/non-con, discussions of rape/non-con, canon-typical violence, graphic descritions, physical abuse, panic attacks, descriptions of injuries (often graphic), psychological warfare, dissociating, psychological torture, physical torture, use of knives, alcoholism/alcohol abuse, pain-induced delirium, rape/non-con, emotional self-separation, suicidal ideation/thoughts of suicide, emotional distress (which sums up the whole fic and also me while reading it), handcuffs/chains used as restraints, referenced/implied abuse towards animals, vomitting, begging, excessive use of painkillers, drowning, waterboarding, physical restraint, mutilation of an animal, mild hallucinations, non-con drugging, sleep deprivation, starvation, humiliation, the Butcher, 

Also one of the first fics I read and 100% my absolute favorite fic!!! Which is adfjhsd a little worrying, considering, but it is what it is. Anyway. This fic absolutely wrecked me, and while it is technically complete, there is a sequel in the works! So! But I am so so excited for the sequel, and I am working on rereading this. It’s amazing. 1000/10.

[sereisstuff]

𝐋𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐥𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐨𝐨𝐝 // Suguru Niragi

Warnings - Swearing, mentions of blood. Implied violence, mentions of bullying. The reader kinda has a savior complex.

word count - 3k

Italics + bold in the beginning is a flashback. Anything beyond the keep reading sign is present tense.

Also this was a first attempt, it’s somewhat what I could come up with at the moment, I was having mixed feelings towards Niragi because of the controversy surrounding his character and fan fictions but he is a fictional character, I’ll leave it at that.

“Leave him alone” 

You screamed bloody murder, watching as tears cascaded down his dewy cheeks running down towards his blood coated collar, baring the harsh texture of a softball plumbing against his broken nose. You witnessed his pleas and the pitiful cries he broke into for someone to help him, it was heart-wrenching.

Your voice broke their trance of hatred towards the poor boy, making you their focus of humour. The boy who seemed a year or two older than yourself coughed taking advantage of the situation to relish his tears onto the floor whilst grasping his stomach in pain. A moment so awful could only bring entertainment for the crowd. 

“Or what princess, are you gonna beat me up for it?” he scoffed, pointing towards Niragi grimly. His lips slithering into a deceitful grin and you swore, a glint of evil was shining behind his cowardly eyes.

You clenched your fist tightly feeling the silver rings bare against your cold hands, this seemed to amuse the group of them as a harmonious wave of laughter flooded beneath the bridge “How cute, a feeble thing like you challenging me? just like a little red riding hood” he muttered, his large feet padded across the cement, advancing towards your figure.

You felt your heart race in anticipation swiping a quick look towards the harmless boy shaking on the floor, angering you to your core. Like the swindling wind, your mind was running in chaos, calculating his every step with a cold glare strung to his eyes. You could almost feel your own body shaking but not in fear, no. In rage. 

“Look at her, she’s afraid of you” one interrupted with a grin, simply ignored his assumption with a raised brow. You were somewhat tall but he still stalked over you like a tree. Rooting your feet into the ground, you spoke “I’m not afraid of you, or any of you for that matter. I’m afraid of what will happen if you touch him one more time and trust me, I won’t be the one shaking in fear, that’s a promise. So go ahead, keep calling me princess, I dare you” your threat was taken lightly although the fear was evident in a few of their eyes once they witnessed the honesty in your eyes. 

A promising advance.

“You're funny, isn’t she funny? How about we make a joke out of you?” He threatened baring his teeth at you.

Your neck craned to meet his eyes, daring him to do as he pleased. One of his members gripped his hand in an attempt to pull him away “just let it go, we can get him next time” 

But he didn’t budge, ripping his friend's hand out of his own and raising it mighty in the air with a subtle hope of destruction lingering between his finger tips. He snarled out his reply “No, I’ll show her what you get when you don’t mind your own business”

You laughed, mocking his accusation, pushing him towards his wits end “That’s it you bitch” 

His hand came crashing down only stopping once you caught his wrist, twisting it around behind his back so he could squirm in pain. The others with slight moral decency, cowered in surprise, backing away from their beloved.

“You like that, huh?” You laughed, now it was your turn to become the heartless monster they awfully played “Does it feel nice being thrown around” you mocked him once more, kicking him into the floor with a nice swing of your boot covered foot, harshly connecting with his stomach so he pummeled in absolute pain.

“Your pathetic, the whole lot of you”

You rested your leg against his soon to be bruised stomach, glaring at everyone of them “Get out of here, before the same happens to you” your tone was stern and clear, sending them a threatening message they received. Although some hesitated but followed like little sheep in a herd, you bent down to their leaders face gripping strands of his hair and pulling his face to meet yours.

“Run along little lamb, watch your herd follow you” 

You made sure they were out of sight before you came back to the realization of the poor boy lying in his own puddle of tears and blood, advancing towards him in a state of worry, you bent down in front of him, arms to your sides in hopes he would understand you were no threat to him. He lifted his head slightly, his left eye of his frames was cracked and his other eye was forming a purplish bruise, you would have done a lot more than that if only you had the time.

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m not gonna hurt you” you whispered softly grasping his attention, beneath his dampened strands he peaked up, a murmur of pain could be heard and beneath his hisses he gradually spoke “Th-thank you” 

“It’s fine, what they did was terrible. I hope you realise that you don’t deserve that” he had no strength to smile and only nod in understanding and suddenly it dawned on you. You had bandages and wipes in your bag, hanging out with a group such as yours you always had to be aware of any bruise and injury, what came with the mix of people you had was prone to wounds and you always came prepared for tragic things.

“I’ll be back” you spoke, standing up with a slight buckle in your knees and the pulsating pain in your fists, you so effortlessly ignored the more wounded. You gripped the straps, throwing it around your forearm and running back to him. You pulled out the bandages and the alcoholic wipes as you tapped his shoulder so he could look up from his dissociation.

“Do you mind?” you asked carefully, tipping your head towards his open wound on his cheek.

He looked at you, knitting his brows in thought. Processing what you said as he weighed out the idea that you were in fact being kind, he nodded looking into your eyes as you almost crumbled at the sight. The pain and hurt hidden behind those doe eyes was painful, you could almost hear the pleas again and you couldn’t bear the thought of that ever happening to you again, so you touched up his cuts with a hiss here and there until he spoke.

“Niragi…...my name is Suguru Niragi” 

Your eyes were blindfolded, fear seeping through your clothes, you didn’t know how you got here only to the point where you suddenly couldn’t breathe, you clawed against the callous fingers wrapped tightly around your neck until you couldn’t anymore.

“How long has she been here?” You heard piquing your interest, your head tipped in surprise hearing multiple voices jump to their question.

You had accepted your fate of death multiple times before this one but something told you to continue, to persevere past your inability to continue. So you did, in an attempt to relish your curiosity and fear, you spoke “Where am I??” silence was your given reply, amongst the void of people you weren’t aware surrounded you, a stern voice spoke with demand “We don’t treat future members like this, take her blindfold off” 

The void you’d been getting used to was finally ripped from your sight and you could suddenly feel the warmth of sun melting into your frozen complex, just as much as you could feel, you also saw. It was unlikely to enjoy such small things like this but in a world of torture, not even people could bring you peace, not anymore at least.

“She seems tattered, this wasn’t our doing wa-” before he could finish his sentence, someone interrupted 

“it’s you?”

 A voice you could recognise anywhere spoke with excitement, his laugh echoing through the room as it bounced off the walls, that didn’t sound like him. That sounded like someone who loved to live in an immoral world chasing sheep after sheep, until you fall into a pit never to come out again.

“How wonderful! I see you two seem well acquainted. I don’t suppose it was from the games?” Niragi shook his head with a grin, he seemed relieved to see you but you couldn’t say the same. You could tell by his appearance he seemed less empathetic, he had just as much reason too but it seemed edging. 

His piercings added to his already threatening look, somewhat seductive to the eye and appealing, far beyond his student years.

“Not at all hatter, me and y/n go way back, don’t we? My little red riding hood” he asked, finally staring into your stern orbs. You felt threatened, the gun leaning against his broad shoulders slid down his arms as he gripped into, pointing it towards your bitter face, his aim was reckless but it didn’t mean it still didn’t shake something in you, you flinched at the sight.

“Oho that seems to catch your attention, should I do it again?” He threatened lightly as he connected his intense gaze with your own, your lips lifted feeling a wave of bravery and keeping your face stern and fearless“I’ve known him since high-school” you spoke plainly masking the fear you hid behind your voice, he definitely wasn’t the warm boy you met that night, his fear nowhere to be seen as he reveled in his own power.

“Fascinating, how a game can bring even the furthest of acquaintances together” Hatter’s crazed dazed rested on you, his jaw clenched as if he suppressed the words he spoke although he spoke as if all the freedom in the world rested on his shoulders, unlike many. Hatter had a free spirit, you could tell by the clothing he wore and how he portrayed himself, although the creator had all the power he seemed unafraid of what was to come, like his own creator.

“What is this place?” You asked.

The hatter walked leisurely around your seat, taking his place behind you with a threatening glare venomously biting at him from Niragi, his soft hands placed against your bare shoulders, massaging them as if to make you seem well enough to become comfortable but once he felt your tensed shoulders, thrash in his palms, he took a moment to pause. 

“Welcome, new comer. To the beach, the utopia, your own personal home of freedom” Once again, the hatters voice was lost in daze.

“The what?” you asked again, that seemed ridiculous.

“The beach, A home I created, a home for those of us to feel our freedom, to bask in it’s warmth. No rules, no governed led law, just three absolute rules that every member of the beach must follow” The hatter rested a palm on your shoulder using it as a stool for his posture.

Amongst his rant, you mellowed out his words. Losing your train of thought in Niragi’s eyes, so much discomfort rested in your own he could almost feel the anger seeping from your bones, angered due to the unruly sense of it all. You either lived or died, a way out was always on your mind but the only thing that kept you running was living, making sure that when the moment came, you would still be here to leave.

Niragi, along with his powerful facade basked in its potential and he made it known to the world with his appearance, the way his voice pitched higher as he stared at your pitiful state, the enjoyment flooding his mouth with a taunting expression, you didn’t notice who that was, who he became but you knew better, deep down. He was still Niragi, the one you saved and comforted, the one who brought you food when you were so deep in school work you couldn’t bear the thought of switching positions, not even for your well-being. 

You were brought back to the world when the touch of a cold barrel met your temples, a loud click followed soon after.

“You're really starting to piss me off, little red riding hood. Do you think we’re dumb, you look at the hatter like he’s an idiot, why would you do that to your saviour” Niragi spoke tauntingly, daring you to cross those barriers you put in place for your own protection, he’s seen you angered once, he’ll see it again.

“Do it” you proclaimed with a straight face, your voice calm as a tideless sea. Niragi scoffed, the corners of his mouth stretching widely and increasingly slow, too slow for your liking. He searched your eyes for fear, wanting the succulent delight of seeing your despair. 

“Or are you scared? I know fear isn’t unknown to you” You hissed back at him, your venomous fangs digging deep into his caged memory, withstood by his own barriers. He locked those memories and threw that key into a bottomless pit but despite that, it was almost like you stood, knocking against the safe he locked his pitiful self in and he was holding the knob with shaking hands, you were resurfacing the past and he vowed to only ever live in the present.

His fingers lingered against the trigger, feeling the power of his hands against the weapon. He was a god in his own eyes but before him rested something more valuable, something he cherished in a past life. He couldn't do it and the hatter noticed this, speculation threw him in and he watched as Niragi pulled the gun away from your head, pointing it towards the roof and letting his pale fingers press the trigger with an anomaly of amusement. 

The power shot from his weapon, creating cracks in the roof as the crumbs of his doing fell in front of your eyes and you released a small breath in relief. 

"untie her, she's going to be with me from now on-wards" Niragi demanded, he was bearing a threat towards the hatters authority. 

Hatter smiled in delight, worry never once tipped his harsh features but you couldn't speak for the others, who not once faltered at your treatment, now seemed worried for your entire being. 

“Do as he says, he clearly knows our fellow members. Therefore, he should do the honors” Hatter demanded, he had a clear distinction for his choice of clothing, making it apparent that his name bore a meaning. Colorful expression distorting his position with his other executive members, freedom per se or maybe it was merely just a coincidence.

Your thrashing was unnoticed in his lock, he ripped you from your place roughly as if you had no meaning to him and it was probably true. Niragi hoisted his machine to the nape of his neck, tugging you in the other hand with what he demanded.

He couldn’t believe his eyes the moment he laid his on yours, it wasn’t often that he met people he once knew without shooting them right where they thought. Ruthless, the capacity for violence he had was uncanny but not unseen for his peers, they knew not of his past and he kept it that way, his psychotic doings sparked a mutual fear within those weaker than him and that was plenty.

“You stick with me or by me from now on, you leave my side for any apparent reason and you're dead, anything you’ve done. I’ve done worse, so I don’t think you want to play with me” in contrast to his previous behavior, he now was in a craze of success. You clenched his hand in an attempt to make him whine in pain just enough for you to run but he surprised you, locking your hand in a harsh grasp that made you bite your lip in pain.

“You should have just killed me when you got the chance, it’s not like you're the same anymore. You’ve changed” You mumbled, ceasing a breath. You relaxed your body and let him lead your way, it’s not like you feared him. As someone you once knew, you often reminded yourself in the moment that he didn’t harm a fly, that was no excuse for him now but in order to keep your sanity at bay, you did just that.

“Why would I do that when I could have fun with you instead?” He laughed.

“As if I would give you the chance too” you retorted.

His steps halted, as he stared forward with a grin. He liked the challenge in your tone, if it was anything. Niragi never once let a challenge get the best of him, he meant what he said and he would make sure more than once that he would get his way.

“Is that a challenge?” he asked, delightfully. Once a friend turned stranger, you stared at the back of his tied hair, the strands falling against his shoulder blades until you caught the sway of his head leisurely turning to face you with a snake like glint in his eyes, the horror of the unknown was creeping up your spine but you weren’t going to back down like a coward, you never did and that wont start today.

“I could warp you into my little pet, do you like being called a pet my little red riding hood. Whatever version of myself was projected onto you, you can forget because the one you're witnessing shares no mercy, not even for you. So thrash and whine as much as you like” Niragi began taking small steps towards you, you backed away in fear still grimly leaving the distaste for his actions lingering on your lips as you threw a look of utter disgust his way.

You managed to walk safely, feeling the brief tender touch of an untouched wall hit your frame, watching him tower over you “Because no one will help you, in fact, I have full control over you, I own you” You scoffed, looking away for a short lived moment before you felt his slender fingers grasp your chin harshly, forcing the contact between you two.

“You must feel so big right now. So utterly powerful, your need to pick on the weaker isn’t a new concept to you, right? In fact it should be so deeply engraved in your brain that not even a rock to the head could erase that, I see. Warp me all you want but I’ll always know you for who you were, my best friend” The words that left your tongue were hot, burning your throat as you held back tears from the countless memories. 

“That’s bullshit, your best friend? That was my need for repayment, that person is long gone now” He screamed, but his face didn’t gleam in despair, no. It shone in glee. The fight was racking up all his pent up anger and he was more than happy to dump it on anyone near, that so happened to be you. 

“Why? Why do you do this. You wouldn’t even harm a fly, the Niragi I knew was soft and caring, he hated violence” you almost screamed, baring your teeth at Niragi, the shine of the dagger he held didn’t even surprise you, his grasp of it against your neck was so close that even the tiniest gulp would have blood seeping from your throat.

“He died, a long time ago” his voice was now emotionless, you could see the shine leaving his face as he reminisced. His stoic features returned but his hold tightened, he grasped both of your hands, casually but sharply holding both above your head with his knife in the other, his body inched close to yours and you felt the texture of his clothing against your body.

“I don’t want to hear you bitching about how you miss what we had, that’s nothing now. You're nothing now, you're not special to me. Just someone I refuse to let go, you know that old saying? Snitches get stitches? Well if you tell anyone about how we met, what I went through, they won’t have any part of their body to stitch back together”

[velvetcloxds]

BREATHE| D.H.

Pairing: Derek x fem! Reader

Word count:2642

Warning: mentions of abusive family member, mentions of abuse, mentions of dead body

Summary: Scott, Stiles and Isaac create a situation where Derek and the reader are forced to talk about the very obvious feelings that they have for each other.

“I don’t know,” I say softly, looking out into the hallway to check for my aunt before softly closing the door behind me, “She’s barely over the fact that I got a B on my midterm paper,” I tell him, moving my books out of the way to sit down on my bed.

“Was it bad?” Isaac asks after a second and I sigh, tracing my fingers under my eye where there should be a completely healed bruise by now.

“It’s been worse,” I answer quickly and he sighs on his end, knowing by now that I wouldn’t tell him if it actually were bad, “I’m fine Isaac, besides it would be much worse without the whole werewolf thing,,” I add, looking up when the front door shuts.

“Was that her?” Isaac asks, the tone of his voice tense. I sigh, jumping up from the bed, pulling the curtain open slightly to see her driving out of the driveway. I smile softly.

“Looks like I’ve got the house to myself for a few hours,” I tell him and hold the phone between my shoulder and my ear as I bend forward to pull my boots on.

“So, does that mean you’ll help us out tonight?” Isaac asks not missing a beat, I smile again as I stand up to grab my jacket.

“Yes, and it also means that the whole lot of you can climb down from the roof and meet me at the front door like normal people,” I say, hearing Isaac’s little laugh in the background as I end the call, the sounds of multiple footsteps on the roof following me as I make my way to the door.

“Why don’t I get to be on the roof?” I hear Stiles ask as I open the door, pulling my jacket on at the same time.

“You know why,” Derek tells him with a cold look causing Stiles roll his eyes.

“You fall down one time and you’re labelled a fall risk,” Stiles notes waving a hand around as his other hand pulls at his plaid shirt.

“It was not one time,” Derek replies very quickly becoming annoyed, “It was three times, and it was but minutes apart,” He adds and lifts a warning brow when Stiles moves to pretest.

“Good evening boys,” I interject before the little spat could continue. Isaac and Scott look over to me with small smiles and apologetic eyes as Derek and Stiles continue to stare each other down, “Derek,” I note formally, making him give Stiles one more warning gaze before locking eyes with me.

“Y/n,” He replies in the same tone after a moment, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket without breaking eye contact for even a second, “You look good,” He says simply, looking me over quickly before meeting my eyes again.

“So do you,” I say and he nods slowly, eyes raking over my face quickly before turning to Scott who is probably waiting for a moment to explain the plan. I smile to myself as I reach behind me to close the door.

“Stiles was listening to his dad’s police radio and there seems to be another body somewhere in the woods,” Scott explains and I furrow my brows at the very vague explanation.

“Is it a werewolf body? The body of someone who was murdered by a werewolf? A hunter? The body of another human sacrifice victim?” I ask, looking between all of them, their blank expressions making it clear that they don’t have an answer to my question.

“Does it matter?” Scott offers carefully and I scoff softly before nodding.

“Yes, it matters, if we’re trying to protect Beacon Hills from supernatural killers and therefore have to find this here dead person in order to that, then I’m with you. But if we’re just going on a little scavenger hunt that’s actually someone else’s job, then I’d like to inform you all that it’s very cold out here and I’m going back inside,” I say, pulling my jacket tighter against my body to emphasize my point.

“She’s right,” Derek notes and I nod at him, “You three said that this was serious and that time was of the essence and so far, it’s been a waste of my time.”

“Time you would’ve spent doing what, Derek? Brooding?” Stiles questions with a mocking smile, shifting back when Derek pulls a hand out of his pocket.

“Look it is serious, we’re not trying to waste anyone’s time,” Scott tells us and rolls his eyes when Stiles moves in behind him, keeping a hand on his shoulder as he looks over at Derek, “We think it’s one of the missing people that’s been killed by whoever’s going around sacrificing people.” He explains and hits Stiles’ hand away from his shoulder.

“Fine,” I say and step forward to walk past them and down the stairs, “We’ll separate into two groups; one group takes the right side and the other takes the left. Who wants to come with me?” I ask looking up at the four of them.

“Derek,” Isaac says very quickly and Derek looks at him with a questioning stare, “It’s either you go with Y/n or you go with Scott and Stiles,” He elaborates and then shrugs as he looks down, Scott and Stiles doing the same when I look over at them, there is definitely something going on here.

“Or Isaac and Derek could go together,” I offer, mainly just to see their reactions.

“No.” Scott says looking a little alarmed as he looks at me. “You’re not exactly Stiles’ biggest fan either. You’d murder him before we even left the yard,” He explains, stuttering in between sentences and I nod slowly, hiding a smile as the boys attempt to hide their frantic glares.

“Okay then, I guess it’s just the two of us,” I tell Derek who looks a little lost for a second as he stares down at me before he nods quickly and makes his way to my side, making sure to give the remaining boys an unplaced glare as he does.

“We’ll meet back here in half an hour, whether we find the body or not,” Derek says beginning to turn before stopping and pointing at Scott and Isaac. “Don’t let Stiles out of your sight,” He says sternly to which the boys nod, “And you, don’t be an idiot,” He adds, pointing at Stiles who is very clearly unhappy with the order. Stiles scoffs.

“I didn’t want you in my group in the first place,” He says and extends the notion towards me when he notices the smile on my lips that I was sure I’d hidden well, “Screw you, Y/n,” He adds as Scott and Isaac pull him from the steps and carefully push him towards the right direction.

“I hate the woods,” I announce softly as we still at the edge of the reserve, looking out onto endless rows of trees, “It gives me the creeps,” I add, tilting my head to get a glance of Derek’s reaction, feeling slightly less annoyed when the softest hint of a smile graces his lips.

“We’ll be out before you know it,” He tells me, not quite meeting my gaze, “You can stay close to me if it helps,” He announces with a quick glance before zipping up his jacket and starting to head off the trail. I take a second to myself, considering the idea of going into this stupid little forest following Derek of all people in there alone and let out a soft sigh.

“Wait up!” I shout, almost jogging to catch up with him despite his offer to keep close to me.

We continue like this for a while, staying close as we look around, sniffing the air for anything that could indicate that there’s a body around here, the only sound being that of our shoes crushing leaves and fallen branches as we walk.

“What?” Derek asks, stopping suddenly after I let out another tired sigh. I frown as I look up at him, “Why do you keep doing that?” He asks and points towards the zip of my jacket which I’ve been moving up and down for the last five minutes. I shrug. “And the sighing, what’s with the sighing?“ He adds in a rush, eyes large as he lets out a loud sigh of his own. I smile up at him.

“I’m bored,” I admit and he folds his arms over his chest, “And don’t even get me started on the silent searching which is driving me mad by the way. Like honestly, Derek, why won’t you talk to me?” I ask, dropping my hands from my jacket to stuff them into my pockets. He looks me over carefully before looking away.

“I don’t know,” He says after a moment and I scoff softly.

“Would you prefer it if I talked, because I have so much to say,” I tell him, taking a step to the side to catch his gaze.

“We need to find this body, Y/n,” He tells me, voice soft and distant. I shake my head, reaching a hand out to stop him from walking away.

“There’s no body, Derek. Well, I don’t think at least,” I say and he frowns, “You really didn’t notice how weird the guys were acting at the house?”

“They’re always weird.”

“Yes, but this was different. They planned this, all of this, somehow. I think they just wanted us to end up alone somewhere where we’re forced to really talk,” I explain and steady myself when my unneeded arm gesture causes me to lose balance.

“Talk about what?” He asks me and I furrow my brows in confusion.

“Don’t do that, you know about what. About you and me. About us,” I say and then shake my head when his eyes largen as a result of my words, “Don’t freak out on me, okay. Just listen,” I say carefully dropping my hand from his arm where it’s been holding him in place.

“Fine. I won’t freak out.”

“You like me,” I deadpan, mind already filling with about a thousand different ways I could’ve approached this, “I mean I think you do and that’s good because boy do I like you too. You’re just not so good with the words and the expression of the feelings and so truth be told I could be completely wrong, but I also don’t think I am. So, to be quite frank I was just curious as to when you were planning on asking me out?” I end, breathless for no reason as I carefully take in the way his expression softens, eyes raking over my face slowly, “I mean you do like me, right?” I ask, my own face softening from slight excitement to unsettled uncertainty as he remains quiet, looking between me and the trees behind me, “You don’t.” I say and let out a soft sigh, realizing how completely silly I must look making this big scene when he very clearly doesn’t feel the same at all.

“Y/n, wait…” He says quickly stupidly attempting to stop me from walking away from him even though I’m already out of reach, “Where are you going?” He asks, deciding to follow me instead.

“I don’t know,” I tell him, fighting the urge to either cry or kick his pretty little ass, “What do you care anyway?” I muse bitterly as I hear him getting closer to me.

“Will you stop?” He asks me annoyed and I feel his hands surrounding my waist to pull me to a stop in front of him, “Will you just give me a bloody minute?” He adds, breath against my neck as he holds me against his body, “If I let go, will you promise not to walk away?” He asks carefully and I nod, his hands moving back and away slowly before I turn around to face him, the seriousness in his eyes catching me by surprise, “I don’t know how to talk to you,” He starts and lets out a long sigh, “It’s like every word I know just completely disappears from my mind the second I see you. The second you smile. The second you say my stupid name. I can’t talk to you,” He explains and my lips almost immediately pull into a smile as response.

“Derek-“

“No. Just let me get this out,” He says, smiling as well as he moves his hands to my waist once again. “I think you’re amazing. You’re good and kind and you barely know anyone of us, but you’d still risk your life to help us out and you’re beautiful, which I should’ve said first, but you are. And you’re so closed off from everyone, but I can still tell exactly what you’re feeling by just looking at you, which is ridiculously unfair because as soon as I convince myself I feel one way for you it changes completely and suddenly I can’t do a bloody thing without thinking about you,” He shakes his head slightly as I let out a soft laugh, lifting my hands to his chest, “Yes, I like you. I like you so much that I feel like I can’t breathe,” He ends and I’m sure my cheeks have turned about every shade of red in but a matter of seconds.

“Breathe, Derek,” I say softly, leaning closer as my fingers move over his chest slowly.

“You’re not being fair,” He says and I can hear his heartbeat rising in pace.

“What are you going to do about it?” I ask carefully, looking up at him through my lashes, biting at my lip to draw his attention there. He smiles, a tint of rose barely touching at his cheeks before disappearing and I’d call him out on it, but the sudden strength of his hands pulling me tighter against his body has me somewhat preoccupied. He leans in as well, nose touching mine.

“This might be a start,” He whispers before catching my lips with his, kissing me slowly yet urgently as I move my hands to his neck, pulling myself even closer as the taste of mint meets my tongue.

Whistles and applause are what pulls us apart, Derek smiling against my lips before he moves away from me, loosely keeping a hand around my waist as we turn to see the boys coming up from behind us.

“I knew this would work,” Stiles announces as the three of them still in front of us. “This is why you need to let me make all of the plans, Scott, because clearly they always work,” He adds excitedly, waving his hands in the air between us. Isaac and Scott simply smiling as they look from him to us.

“I’m happy for you two,” Isaac says with an almost brotherly smile.

“Do you think they’ll have a June wedding?” Stiles asks in thought, smiling as another thought comes to mind, “Do you think we’ll have to ask her for him?” He adds and Scott nudges him when Derek growls lowly.

“We should get you home, your aunt could get home soon,” Scott tells me and we all nod in union before the tree of them turn to walk away in the direction of my house. I try to do the same, smiling when Derek pulls me back softly.

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow night,” He states simply and I look up at him confused. He laughs before placing another soft kiss on my lips, “Out date.” He clarifies and smiles happily when I realize what he’s talking about, “I’ll pick you up tomorrow night,” He says again and I nod.

“I’ll bring the dictionary,” I muse, laughing softly as he rolls his eyes, pulling me with him as we follow the boys home.

Hi there, more of my work can be found on Wattpad under @mjoubertt. Mxx.

Masterlist

[minshookie]

Meetings at midnight.

Pairing | mafia!Taehyung x Reader

Genre | angst, yandere

Summary | “after your failed attempt at escape Taehyung can’t afford to leave you alone anymore.”

!warning! | dark themes, forced relationship, unhealthy relationship ideals, talk of past abuse, sexual tension[18+ please],mental issues(manipulation) and strong language.

| this is not in anyway shape or form a true depiction or representation of BTS, this is a work of fiction and is not to be taken seriously. For entertainment purposes only.|(this is my work, please don’t repost or steal)

Requested [open for request] words:1k

A/N “ I hope this is something you’ll enjoy, all in all I just hope it isn’t disappointing haha. This is my first piece in a while so I’m a bit rusty, so go easy on me i beg. :)”

Racing quicker than lightning, intrusive thoughts paced your mind. At the moment taking your chances of tumbling from the car seemed sweeter than the kiss he left on your lips this morning. The taste of him, the feel of his softened palm on your inner thigh, the savory tone of his voice. It all made your stomach churn all too well. He softly hums the relaxed jazz tune that's spilling from the car, grabbing fistfuls of your exposed tender thigh. Not caring for the lasting blemishes he's leaving in its wake. Leaving you home alone no longer an option after your futile attempt at escape, the grim punishment after leaving you more dead than alive. You find yourself in his passenger, nearing an unknown fate.

“Of all the things I prepared for you-” he cuts himself short, pausing his assault on your leg to lower the music before resuming his position. “You chose the whorish white skirt I practically hid In the back of the wardrobe.” He chuckles to himself, taking his lip between his teeth. Pleased with his harsh comment he soon feels bad, “ I love you anyway, I can’t keep off of you.” Bringing your limp hand to his lips kissing it tenderly. Going back to kneading your sore inner thigh.

You’d actually begun the tedious search for this skirt he’d gifted to you the moment he informed you of the small meeting he wanted you to attend. Wearing it leaves little to The imagination,displaying bruise after bruise. Red flags dancing in the wind to any individual in possession of common sense. It might be wishful thinking but you gladly agreed to attend in the hopes of being rescued from your own personal damnation...

In the dead of night, he raced through empty streets finally meeting his destination, a place unknown to you. Clearing his throat harshly, you felt his eyes linger on you, refusing to give in, your gaze lingered on the house’s landscape. “When we walk in, don’t speak. I'll speak for you, keep your hand In my pocket, understand?” Coyly you turned, a chill rolling down your back meeting his dark eyes under the low beam of light being given by street lamps. “Understood...fully.” You softly respond.Boyishly he grins, giddily he exits the car coming to your side freeing you. Standing to the side he roughly shuts the door.

Standing in front, taking a hold of your wrist, he plants it in the back pocket of his slacks firmly. Domantly he leads you to the entrance, tugging you along like a wounded puppy. Your heart flutters with excitement at the thought of freedom,silently you pray for your scheme to work.

Unlocking the door he finally leads you in, “your eyes, close them, now .” He places his key away. His demeanor shifts harshly, being accustomed to this tone you wholeheartedly comply to his strange request. Trusting his lead, he takes you through twists and turns up the stairs carefully and through doors of the large home. Finally your feet meet a stop. A door is opened, multiple voices are heard then hushed. “Hyung!” Cheerfully a voice greets him. “Open now.” Shyly you do as told, opening to six men all huddled around, all peering at you, some in disapproval . From their glare alone you know your plan had blown into smoke. “This is Y/N.” He moves slightly, showing you off the best he could.

Truly unable to focus, you shift eye contact with all of them, “are you not going to speak?” The one standing in the middle spoke up, he held a stern facial expression keeping strong eye contact. You could tell his intention was to make you feel small, and it was working all too well. You cowered behind Taehyung, you were obviously out of place, obviously unwanted company. “Ah she’s being a good girl tonight, I told her not to speak.” He turns with a smile, pulling your arm to move you fully into sight. Denying his action you grab harshly into his pant pocket, grasping onto your false security.

Keeping sheepish contact with the rest of his crew, eyeing you like they were hungry animals. Why would he bring you here, why would you dress this way? Sickeningly he’d conditioned you into thinking their primal gaze was all of your fault, what a whorish way you came tonight. “Well I’m Namjoon, this at my left is Jin, Yoongi, Jungkook, Jimin, Hoseok.” He pointed around himself, each of them offered some form of greeting.

Tae began to walk again, shuffling close behind him until he sat down, pulling you into his lap as the rest of them sat around the large table. Struggling to pull the sheer fabric of the skirt over your exposed legs your face grew hot as his hand found a home between your thighs. Regretting your wardrobe decision you turn to bury your face in your captors neck. The stare of the men around you spiking your anxieties, before you’d wish to be anywhere but the house of Kim Taehyung. But now you would love to be there sheltered under his chilled silk sheets.

They spoke in mumbles, business and respect, trades and murder. He rubbed his large hand over your shivering back, “you should’ve taken a coat, you’re shaking like a leaf kitten.” He mumbles warmly against your ear. A disapproving sigh is given,his small act of care had been found out. “is she going to distract all of you, Taehyung, take her into the hall and leave her till we’re finished.” Namjoon spoke as if You were some sort of toy to him.

You turned swiftly pleading with your eyes, frankly Namjoon was tired of your presence. He was all tight business. Taking his hand away from your back, he took a breath attempting to rebuttal, “she shouldn’t even be hearing this, any of it.” Yoongi spoke up over him looking up from the table, his glare the harshest.

Two against six, You felt your heart flutter in fright. You strangely felt secure on him, being alone in the hall would feel like torture in this unknown place. You took the fabric of Tae’s coat between my fingers. He might be crazy, but I know he wouldn’t kick you out, he’s crazy about you, and you only.He slowly gets up , your feet hit the floor. “Think about your position hyung.” The youngest of the group whispers his eyes stretching, “Leave I dare you.” Namjoon’s lips puckered at the side as he bit the inside of his cheek, he sat back in his chair motioning towards the door. “You’ll be dead before Monday….you and your little bitch too.” He finishes his threat crossing his arms.

He chuckles lowly before speaking, You’ve heard that laugh before. “The fact that you all think I’d leave is unnerving...seems like you wanted me gone anyway.” His voice is flat and full of annoyance. “Don’t take it that way.” Jimin attempts to cool the situation that’s growing in heat. “I think I’ll go, try to kill me if you want, you’ll be rudely awakened Namjoon….you and your slutty bitch too.” His temper nearing its peak, you could hear it in his tone. “You never trusted me, any of you.” His unstable anger getting the best of him, it never takes much to rile him up.

His sadness transforms to anger in the matter of seconds. After throwing a few more loaded threats he harshly pulls you out of the room, they silently watch. He keeps a death grip on your wrist, knowing better than to speak you struggle to keep up with his angered steps. “This is all your fault.” He grumbles causing you to trip siigthly. Picking up the speed were at the car in record speed, shivering you wait for him to unlock the door. “I stick up for you and now everything’s gone to shit and you have nothing to say.” He pushed you in, without the strength respond you mearly Trimbled in the passenger seat.

He backs out of the driveway, “you’re lucky you’re mine, you’re lucky I love you anyway.” He sighs in aggravation, if this is luck, you’d rather have death.

(Not my photo)

[jayoctodot]

The Silent Patient vs The Maidens

I will start by saying that I understand the appeal of these novels as page-turners. They are easy to read and if you want a twisty reveal at the end, you will probably be entertained and satisfied. That being said, I am SO CONFUSED by the near-universal adoration of The Silent Patient and the reasonably positive reception of The Maidens. The weaknesses of the two are strikingly similar, as well, which doesn’t give me much hope of seeing improvement from this guy, though I am intrigued to see whether he keeps repeating the same (apparently successful!!) patterns. These books were at least super fun to hate.

(For context, I read The Maidens for a bookclub I'm in, because several of the members had read and loved The Silent Patient, and one of them gave me a copy of the latter to read on my own time. I loathed The Maidens and then read The SP for comparative purposes. And because I'm a masochist, apparently.)

SPOILER WARNING! Do not read on unless you've finished both books (or unless you care not for spoilers). Sorry if it gets a bit shouty.

Here are the similar weaknesses I noticed in both:

PSEUDO-PSYCHOLOGY

-> Weirdly similar “group therapy” scenes early on where a cartoonishly unstable patient arrives late, disrupts the meeting by throwing something into the middle of the circle, and is asked to join the group after the therapist(s) speechify on the importance of boundaries (HA! None of these therapists would know an appropriate boundary if it kicked them in the ass) and debate whether to “allow” the patient to join. Both scenes are so transparent in their design to establish the credibility/legitimacy of the narrators as therapists, but instead both Theo and Mariana come off as super patronizing. The protagonists are less and less believable as therapists at the stories progress (though at least Theo’s incompetence is explained away by the “twist” at the end; Mariana, on the other hand, is confronted in the opening pages of the novel by a patient who has self-harmed PRETTY extensively, and rather than ensure he get proper medical attention, she essentially throws him a first aid kit and tosses him out the door so she can pour herself a glass of wine and call her niece... and it devolves from there).

-> Ongoing insistence throughout the narrative that one’s childhood trauma entirely explains the warped/dysfunctional way a character behaves or views the world, which is why the books go out of their way to give EVERY potentially violent character a traumatic childhood; when Theo insists that no one ever became an abuser who hadn’t been abused themselves, I wanted to throw the book across the room. (That is a MYTH, SIR. GET OUT OF HERE WITH YOUR ARMCHAIR PSYCHOLOGY.)

-> Female murderers whose pathology boils down to “history of depression” and “traumatized by a male loved one/family member.” Because, as we all know, depression + abuse = murderer!

-> The “therapy” depicted in both books is laughable and so so unrealistic, mostly because neither narrators function as therapists so much as incompetent detectives, obsessively pursuing a case they have no place pursuing (or skill to pursue - both just happen across every clue mostly by way of clunky conversation with all the people who can provide precisely the snippet of info to send them along to the next person, and the next… until all is revealed in a tired, cliched “twist”). Their constant Psych 101 asides were so tiresome and weirdly dated (also, the constant harping on countertransference got so ridiculous that at one point during "therapy" Theo literally attributes his headache and a particular emotion he feels to Alicia, as though the contents of her head are being broadcast directly into his mind... and I'm PRETTY SURE that's not how it works???)

CHARACTERS

-> Psychotherapist narrators with abusive fathers and pretensions of being Sherlock Holmes, which results in both characters crossing ALL KINDS of ethical lines as they invade the personal lives of everyone even tangentially connected to their cases (and, in Theo's case, violate all kinds of patient confidentiality. Yeah, yeah, by the end, that's the least of his offenses, but before you get there, it's baffling that NO ONE is calling him out on this).

-> All female characters are either elderly with hilariously bad advice, monstrous hulking brutes, or beautiful bitches (except for ~MARIANA~, who is Bella Swan-esque in her unawareness of her own attractiveness, despite multiple men trying to get with her almost immediately after meeting her. I'm so tired of beautiful female characters being oblivious to their own hotness. Are we meant to believe all mirrors and male attention have escaped their notice? If it’s to make them “relatable,” this tactic really fails with me).

-> All characters of color are shallow, cartoonish side characters, and most of them are depicted as unsympathetic minor antagonists (the Sikh Chief Inspector in The Maidens continuously drinks tea from an ever-present thermos, and his only other notable characteristic is his instant dislike of Mariana, whom he VERY RIGHTLY warns to stay out of the investigation that she is VERY MUCH compromising… the Caribbean manager of the Grove is universally disliked by her staff for enforcing stricter safety regulations at the bafflingly poorly run mental institution, because HOW DARE SHE. There's a very clear vibe that we're supposed to dislike these characters and share the protagonists' indignation, but honestly Sangha/Stephanie were completely in the right for trying to shut down their wildly inappropriate investigations).

-> "Working class" characters (or basically anyone excluded from the comfortably upper-crust, educated main cadre of characters) are few and far between in both stories, but when they show up, he depicts them as such caricatures. We got Elsie the pathologically lying housekeeper in the Maidens, who is enticed to share her bullshit with cake, and then a TOOTHLESS LEPRECHAUN DEALING DRUGS UNDER A BRIDGE in the SP. I kid you not, a man described as having the body of a child, the face of Father Time, and no front teeth, emerges from beneath a bridge and offers to sell Theo some "grass." I was dyinggg.

-> There are no characters to root for. Anywhere. Partly because they’re all so thinly drawn — and because we’re clearly supposed to view almost ALL of them as potential suspects, so they’re ALL weird, creepy, or incompetent in some way.

-> The flimsiest of flimsy motives, both for the narrators and the murderers. Theo fully would have gotten away with his involvement in the murder if he hadn't gone out of his way to work at the Grove and "treat" Alicia and his justification for doing so is pretty weak; his rapid descent into stalking and murder fantasy and his random ass decision to "expose" Alicia's husband as a cheater with a spur-of-the-moment home invasion and staged attempted homicide is ONLY justified if the reader hand waves it away as WELP, HE'S CRAZY, I GUESS (after all, he DID have an abusive father and a history of mental illness, and in Michaelides novels, that's ALL YOU NEED to become a violent psycho). I guess we're lucky Mariana didn't also start dropping bodies (because the logic of his fictional universe says she should definitely be a murderer by now... maybe that'll be his Maidens sequel?). But she especially had NO reason to randomly turn detective - and she kept trying to justify it by saying she needed to re-enter the world or that Sebastian would want her to (??), even though she had no background in criminal psychology... or even a particular fondness for mysteries (really, I would've accepted ANYTHING to explain her dogged obsession with the case. WHY were Sebastian and Zoe so certain she would insert herself into the investigation just because one of Zoe's friends was the first victim? WHY?). As for Zoe and Alicia, their motives are mere suggestions: they were both abused and manipulated, and voila! Slippery slope to murder.

WRITING STYLE

-> Incessant allusions to Greek tragedy and myth, apparently to provide a sophisticated gloss over the bare-bones writing style, which opts more for telling than showing and frequently indulges in hilariously bizarre analogies. Credit where credit is due — the references to Greek myth are less clunky in the SP, and I liked learning about the Alcestis play/myth, which I hadn’t heard of before - but OMG the entire characterization of Fosca, who we are meant to believe is a professor of Greek tragedy at one of the most respected universities on the planet, is just absurd. His "lecture" on the liminal in Greek tragedy is essentially the Wikipedia page on the Eleusinian Mysteries capped off with some Hallmark-card carpe diem crap. The lecture hall responds with raucous applause, clearly never having heard such vague genius bullshit before.

-> Super clunky and amateurish narrative device of interludes written by another character; Sebastian’s letter reads like a mashup of Dexter monologues and Clarice’s memory of the screaming sheep, but by FAR the worse offender is Alicia’s diary, where we’re supposed to believe she painstakingly recorded ENTIRE CONVERSATIONS, BEAT-BY-BEAT DIALOGUE, even when she’s just been DRUGGED TO THE GILLS with morphine and has mere moments of consciousness left… and even before that, she literally takes the time to write “He's trying the windows and doors! ...Someone’s inside! Someone’s inside the house! ETC ETC” when she thinks her stalker has broken in downstairs. WHO DOES THAT?)

-> Speaking of dialogue, the dialogue is so bad. Based on his bio, Michaelides got a degree in screenwriting, which makes his terrible dialogue even more baffling.

-> HILARIOUSLY rendered voyeur scenes where the narrators spy on couples having sex. Such unintentionally awkward descriptions. First we had Kathy’s climax sounds through the trees and then the bowler hat carefully placed on a tombstone before the gatekeeper plows a student. Again, I died.

PLOT/"TWIST"

-> The CONSTANT red herrings make for such an exhausting read. Michaelides drops anvils with almost every character that are so obviously meant to designate them as suspects in our minds. There is absolutely no subtlety in his misdirections.

-> The “crossover” scene between the SP and The Maidens makes no sense - when in the timeline does Mariana’s story overlap with Theo’s? They confer just before Theo starts working at the Grove, obviously (though Mariana appears to be the one who alerts Theo to the job opening there? Whereas in the SP, Theo has been obsessively tracking Alicia since the murder and had already planned to apply to work there?), but then are we supposed to believe that while Theo has been psychotically pursuing his warped quest to “help” Alicia, he’s also been diligently treating Zoe, so invested in her case that he repeatedly reaches out to Mariana to get her to visit Zoe and even writes Mariana a lengthy letter to convince her to do so??? And then a couple days after The Maidens ends, Theo is arrested???

-> But the thing I really did hate the most is how Michaelides treats his female murderers (who are both also victims themselves) as mere means to deploy a “twist”; there’s no moment spared to encourage our sympathy for Zoe, who was groomed and manipulated by the only trusted father figure in her life, and even after spending a decent amount of time getting to know Alicia via her ridiculous diary, where it’s so apparent that she’s been demeaned, objectified, manipulated, gaslit, and/or used by EVERY man in her life, she’s sent packing to spend the rest of her days in a coma… HOW much more satisfying would it have been for her to succeed in exposing Theo and reclaiming her voice? But no, she basically rolls over when he comes to finish her off (SPEAKING OF — ARE WE SUPPOSED TO BELIEVE THERE ARE NO SECURITY CAMERAS IN THIS INSTITUTE FOR THE CRIMINALLY INSANE????), writes one last diary entry, and drifts off forever. And then a couple pages of nothing later, the story is over. GOODNIGHT, ALICIA!

Both books kept me rolling throughout (by which I mean eye-rolling but also rotfl). Maybe I will check out his next effort — I’m morbidly curious what he’ll turn out. It does leave me wondering whether I should give up on thriller novels entirely, though. Are many of the weaknesses of these novels just characteristic of the genre? Maybe I'm just holding these books to unfair standards? I'm mostly only familiar with thriller films — many of which I think are amazing — but maybe you can get away with more in a film than you can in a novel.

...I really only intended to write a handful of bullet points, but more and more kept coming to mind as I wrote, to the point where subheadings became necessary. Whoopsie.

[gayfrenchtoast]

Okay fine we're doing this. I havent read the books and I'm probably not going to I've only seen the movies so I'm sorry if anything I say is contradictory or has already been stated.

So! Descendants 3 was kinda shit and I dont like it but especially because of the ending because everybody was like "oh yeah island is open and we're all happy with no worries or implications about free villains or people being spiteful about being imprisoned for years!" In fact if anything they joked about those things.

The island is basically its own culture, I can't say how long it's been around, long enough for some almost adult kids to be about and to develop a kind of community.

The Isle is a place of poverty, people are dirty and on the street, eveyone steals from each other and most people don't put much effort into appearance upkeep (personal or of the sourounding area) not because of laziness or being "evil" but because they clearly don't have time or luxury to do such things or possibly even the clean water. Does the Isle have clean water?? How to they get electricity??? Someone tell me!

Another thing that I've noticed is easy to see but is not much explicitly said is the unique style of those on the Isle. As previously stated they don't have much but those who have the most "power" and such on the Isle are the best example of this As they have the most colourful outfits. However these outfits are often made out of patches and ripped things put together, even salvaged things like nets and chains as we can see on thing like Uma and Harry's outfits in D3 they make the best of what they've got and they do fantastic because their outfits are intricate and detailed and just tell you everything you need to know about them. Which is why it's a damn s h a m e when the original VK's ajust their style to be more like Auradon's. That's not an improvement! Be proud of where you came from!! It's like they forgot what it was like being on the Isle in D3!

Moving on, here's something that was touched on in D2 but not enough. Equality. On the Isle there is basically equal opportunity as in saying everything is shit and nome cares what gender and presumably what sexuality you are as long as you can work. Sexism is shown to be almost casual in aurodon from the looks of it, Chad makes sexist comments and litterally none else says anything or seems to see anything wrong with it except Jay who caves to pressure from peers and expectations. He does redeem himself because he's from the isle and he knows you shouldn't give a shit about anyone's gender or anything. If they can do something and ask to be included you give them that opportunity. The sexism is also implied in the way that the rule book has men written specifically in the first place and that it has taken until then for anyone but boys to be allowed on any kind of sports team. We never see it! It seems to be the hetronormative veiw where the boys do sport and girls do cheerleeding and other genders? What other genders? Never heard of that? BAD AURADON!! I bet there's so many trans folk on the island just living their lives, thinking Aurodon is the better place and not knowing that it's a cis het filled nightmare.

Okay no I'm headcannoning now, if their are now a bunch of Isle kids at auradon prep they find it fucking aweful the way all these preppy royals are treating them and make the first LGBT club in Auradon. There is lots of pushback and they get bullied a fuck ton for making themselves the most prominent queer folk in the school until a fight breaks out and the club demand that they should be treated better, taking all the evidence to fairy godmother who is very hesitant because COME ON she's never been that great she is biased to Auradon kids and if putting away those in the Isle is brought up she is all on it, she is jelly spined about doing anything against the royal kids. So the kids are like "Fine, if you won't help us we'll take this to the King himself!" Well mainly the queer mom's of the group (you know the ones I'm talking about) who lead the others and protect the anxious queers as they storm to Ben at his fucking locker and demand an audience because they are being harassed and bullied and none is doing anything. Ben had no idea there was even a LGBT club (too busy ig) and is gassed there is one for a moment before he's like "wait people are harassing you?" So Bisexual King Ben gets his lovely Bi wife and they start coming to club meetings and investing in the pins and stuff the club makes. Most club members are pleased but the queer mom's are apprehensive that this will help until some assholes come to the club to do their usual bullying only to find King and Queen Beast themselves siting there with rainbow bracelets and bi pins and all trying to have a nice old time eating their fucking cupcakes what the fuck are yall doing? The bullying dies down quick once they realise it ain't gonna fly, the other OG VK's that hear about this become members and very protective over their queer children. Did I mention Dizzy and Ceila are a part of the club? They're girlfriend's. Celia is one of the queer moms. Harry becomes one of the biggest protectors over the group as the pan dad. He's been going around snogging everyone and anyone wholl snog him everyone already knew he was queer they just didn't have the balls to try and bully him over it as much as they bullied the lil club members. But now Harry can often be seen in jackets and shit with pan and general queer patches and pins and running around with his gay children yelling "MOVE WE'RE GAY!!" He totally calls them his queer crew. Anyway as a result lots of queer royals start coming out of the woodwork, obvs Lonnie is one of them, and the club eventually serves to bring members of Auradon and the Isle close together.

Where was I? Yada yada auradon expects girls to be pretty princesses and boys to be brave knights or dashing princes. It's shit and should stop being portrayed as good. Moving on!

Food! One of the things we'll established in all movies is that the food of the Isle is shit compared to food of Auradon. The Isle has no fresh fruit which likely means its almost impossible for things to grow there which is fair because again there doesn't seem to be much fresh water and there are always clouds overhead so no sun. Maybe there is some people trying really hard to grow stuff but the general attitude of the Isle seems to be "there is no time for that" and fruits are forgotten so much that the VK's litterally don't knownwhat they are when they come across them. That and anything containing sugar. Actually it's mention by Dizzy and Celia that they enjoy the fact that the cake dosent have dirt or flies so basically food there is terrible. We don't see much food on the Isle but what we do see seems to be beans, eggs, chips and shellfish. Basically protine and carbs that can be easily stored and produced. To be fair beans are kidna good for you but they're likely a sign that if they get any imports from the mainland it is canned stuff. Prison food. There's probably some chef villain that is trying their best to make good food out of the shit but honestly the Isle dwellers should be angry that they've been deprived of good food for so long not happy they're finally been given decency.

Moving on, music! Auradon dosent have nearly as many musical numbers it seems, the Isle songs have a distinct style, to them, the villains that basically "founded" the place were masters of the dramatic songs (with backup or solo) so banging music is basically ingrained in the music's culture, even for battle as we see with the fight between Mal and Uma in D3. Meanwhile Auradon seems to have mainly romance and "I want" songs. Even Audrey's villain song is basically an I want song.

Okay let's talk about the Villains. We've established that the VK's are not inherently bad. However not all of them can be totally good and there are legit OG Villains just kinda chillin on the Isle. They've obviously lost quite a bit of their power, motivation and sanity (isolation will do that to ya as they lost everything and the VKs know no different) but deadass? They were bad guys. You can try to rehabilitate them sure but you've basically just let them free roam, they could make a runner and you wouldn't get the chance. They were also shitty patents which is brushed over/joked about in the interaction between Carlos and...man I feel bad I forgot her name deadass their relationship seemed to come out of nowhere in the second film she didn't seem interested in them at all and friendzoned them multiple times I'm pretty sure Disney did that becaue queer kids were relating to Carlos and headcanoning them as queer (which they deffinatly are) but deadass their mom is an attempted animal murderer and has hurt her child as we can see from how they're afraid of her and her rhetoric and yet it's "haha I'm afraid to meet your ma!" "Me too cus im a dog! Lol!" Fuuuuck offfffff

I think I'm running out of thoughts so here's a last one for now; with the magical barrier down a bunch of magical Villains kids should be coming out for the woodwork. We know Mal has magic basically stored in her so it's is possible, she technically doesn't need the spellbook to do magic it is just inherent to her. So with the diverse range of people from the isle there are deffinatly magic folk in there. Actually if we're following Disney movie law I saw something mentioning Jay being half Genie and yeah! He should be half Genie! Jafar got turned into a Genie he's probably only human because of the barrier! Oh also Ben should be able to go beast on command as long as he had a better beast form than he did in the movies. And give him back the beard and fangs like fuck you he looked so much better

Okay I'm done for now

[fakeikemen]

Katara's Grief

(This is my first attempt at a meta post and I know that this has probably been already done but I just needed to get it off my chest and go on a little rant and it kinda got long so bear with me.)

A lot of the hate on Katara stems from the fact that she keeps on mentioning her mother's death at every chance she gets and invalidates other people's pain to assert that her suffering is the worst of the lot.

And even though everybody is entitled to their own opinions, I'm gonna point out why I think the aforesaid claims are not exactly correct.

First we'll take a look at; Katara's Backstory:

We know that Kya is killed in a fire nation raid and that Katara had been the last person to see her alive before she leaves the tent on her mother's insistence. Only to come back a few moments later and find her dead body. This, in itself is a traumatising event.

So yes, her mother died. Other people in the story go through far worse. You're not wrong when you say that.

But what is more important in Katara's story is the aftermath of her mother's death.

As Sokka says while talking to Toph in "The Runaway" in B3 Ep7:

Sokka: When our mom died, that was the hardest time in my life. Our family was a mess, but Katara? She had so much strength. She stepped up and took on so much responsibility. She helped fill the void that was left by our mom.

As an eight year old, she had to force herself to grow up to step into her mother's shoes and raise herself and her elder brother and simultaneously look after the entire village after her father left to fight in the war. She had to do all of it by herself.

In face of all her responsibilities, she never really had the chance to simply be a grieving child lamenting the loss of her mother. She habituated herself to caring more about others than herself (We see this trait in the entire series as she acts as the stand-in mom friend for the entire Gaang with an exception of Suki and Zuko). She ended up bottling her feelings of grief, resentment, guilt and rage deep within herself.

She had to give up an extensive part of her childhood where most children focus on figuring themselves out, to become a mature and responsible person who was working as the immovable pillar holding up the family and even the whole village not much later.

She put up a strong front to help others and pretended to be fine even though she was hurting inside the whole time.

She could never find any closure from the situation. She never got over it.

Moving on to the criticisms:

1. Katara keeps on mentioning her mother like a broken record:

Here are the number of times Katara mentions her mother's death (not sure if that's all of it, lmk if there are any others):

1. In her first scene with Sokka

Katara: Ever since mom died, I've been doing all the work around camp while you've been off playing soldier!

2. A short while after she meets Aang

Katara: Well, I just want you to be prepared for what you might see. The Fire Nation is ruthless. They killed my mother, and they could have done the same to your people.

3. A short while after she meets Haru

Katara: I lost my mother in a Fire Nation raid. This necklace is all I have left of her.

4. A short while after she meets Jet

Katara: Sokka and I lost our mother to the Fire Nation.

5. In the swamp after she sees a vision of her mother

Katara: I thought I saw Mom.

6. In the Crystal Catacombs with Zuko

Katara: I don't? How dare you! You have no idea what this war has put me through! Me personally! The Fire Nation took my mother away from me.

7. A short while after she meets Hama

Katara: We completely understand. We lost our mother in a raid.

8. Repeated mentions in The Southern Raiders episode

(Most of the episode basically)

The first mention with Sokka is in the middle of a siblings' spat where she tells off Sokka for trying to act as if he were superior when it was obvious that in the face of the gaping hole that was left by Kya's sudden death, Katara had shouldered much more responsibility.

When she tells it to Aang, she uses it as a proof that the Fire Nation is capable of immense cruelty and destruction.

The Gaang travel all around the world and meet different people affected by the war in different ways. So when Haru, Jet and Hama narrate their own stories, Katara sympathises with them and talks about Kya's death in lieu of "I understand, the Fire Nation hurt me too."

After they got separated, Aang, Sokka and Katara each had their visions and after they get back together, they all mention their visions and so does Katara.

When left alone in catacombs with Zuko, whom she considered as the face of the Fire Nation— the same Fire Nation that had her mother killed and forced her father to leave to fight in the war, she has a meltdown where she rightfully accuses him of all the bad things he's done and then breaks down while talking about how the war has cost her i.e., by causing her mother's death.

The Southern Raiders is the episode where Katara hunts down the man responsible for her mother's death. If you think mentioning Kya repeatedly in this episode is uncalled for, then I don't know what to tell you.

In all the incidents mentioned above, Katara mentioning her mother's death is a very natural occurrence is the respective conversations. She mostly talks about Kya's death to either extend her sympathy or to use it as an example of the ruthlessness of the Fire Nation.

Another fact to be noted is that 70% of the Gaang's storyline is followed via Katara from a narrative point of view. Plus, being the mom-friend, she acts as the spokesperson. Considering that Kya's death is a major event that played a huge role in shaping Katara's life and is also the source of her severe, unresolved trauma, which acts as the driving force of her story, it is only natural that she brings up this topic whenever she is engaging in a deeper conversation.

It is us as the viewers who have seen her from the start and already know about her mother's death and we see her talking to multiple people about it. Which is why it might come across as repetitive to some people.

While, Kya's death is not necessary information that everyone needs to know, Katara talking about it never comes across as a forced or unnatural.

2. Katara invalidates others' pain because she thinks she has suffered the most:

First of all, if anything, Katara is the most empathetic person of them all. As the mom-friend of the group, not only is she their constant moral support, she also helps them untangle and sort out their own feelings. She is also able to tap into issues that aren't said out loud.

Instances of Katara helping and supporting Aang, emotionally are uncountable.

She is the first one to notice Sokka's sour mood in B3 Ep4 "Sokka's Master". And even though his insecurities seem baseless, she validates him (by saying "I'm sorry you're feeling so down" instead of something like "That's a dumb thing to say") and knows exactly what to do to cheer him up.

In B3 Ep7 "The Runaway" she has the insight to understand that Toph's unruly behaviour is caused by the mixed feelings she has about her parents even though Toph's herself never talked about it.

She even reaches out to Zuko in B2 Ep19 "Crossroads of Destiny" even though she used to think of him as the face of the enemy.

But then there's The Southern Raiders.

Ah yes, that episode where Katara is extremely OOC and a total b*tch.

Agreed that she said some things that she definitely shouldn't have said. But like, she's just 14?? And has been hurting on the inside since she was 8?? And pretended to be fine just for the sake of other people?? Like, there's a limit to how much she can have her shit under control?? And she did a real good job of Sokka's upbringing and taking care of the village and taking care of Gaang on her own?? Some people out there are really willing to forget everything she has ever done just because she was mean for 5 minutes?? A traumatised 14 yo shouldn't be villianised and called toxic because she got mad and lashed out at people that one time??

But here's my take on the scene anyway:

When Aang gets to know that she's going to go face her mother's killer:

Aang: Um ... and what exactly do you think this will accomplish?

Katara: I knew you wouldn't understand. 

Aang is a non-confrontational person who prefers running away from difficult situations as opposed to Katara who firmly stands her ground and is never afraid of confrontations. Katara had approached Aang only hoping that he would understand. But going by his dismissal, he obviously doesn't understand the burning need that she has to confront the man who had single-handedly destroyed her childhood. (Most people infer that what Katara means is that she thinks that Aang doesn't understand the pain of losing people. And so does Aang, I guess)

But things start getting even more tricky when:

Aang: Katara, you sound like Jet.

In all honesty, this is probably the most insensitive thing that she could've heard from anyone right then, let alone one of her closest friends. Hearing herself being compared to a homicidal maniac just because she wants to avenge her mother's killer. (No, I'm not justifying murder but there's a clear difference between homicide and avenging someone's death. And Aang may not be my favourite character but I do love him but this wasn't really a good thing to say either. And he wasn't even mentally distressed in the very least to be completely lacking tact or a filter.)

And then the situation escalates:

Sokka: Katara, she was my mother, too, but I think Aang might be right.

Katara: Then you didn't love her the way I did!

After 6 long years of Katara bottling in her dark feelings and letting them fester inside herself, she is finally letting them out and the first things she faces in a span of few minutes are outright rejection, invalidation of her feelings, comparison to a homicidal maniac and nothing akin to the unconditional support that she has provided to everybody. Her own brother tells her that he is siding with the boy who just compared her to a homicidal maniac.

Yes, accusing your own brother of not loving your mother enough is a very cruel thing to do. But both Sokka and Katara know that she doesn't entirely mean it.

But also, there is one very important factor in here:

In B3 Ep7 "The Runaway", Sokka says to Toph:

Sokka: I'm gonna tell you something crazy. I never told anyone this before, but honestly? I'm not sure I can remember what my mother looked like. It really seems like my whole life, Katara's been the one looking out for me. She's always been the one that's there. And now, when I try to remember my mom, Katara's is the only face I can picture. 

Katara overhears this conversation just as Sokka had meant her to.

This dialogue lets us know that Sokka's coping mechanism has made him suppress all memories of Kya and replace them with memories of Katara in order to attain a semblance of normalcy.

Both Katara and Sokka had very different ways of coping with Kya's death. Katara pressed down her feelings and tried her best to pretend to ignore them while Sokka partially succeeded in forgetting her.

When Katara first hears these words she is shown to be crying. But if she were to remember these very words while she was justifying herself infront of her own brother and a close friend for wanting to avenge her mother, it would've had a negative impact on her.

In her rage, she would've thought: "Of course he doesn't want to avenge mom. Because he doesn't think it's worth it and that's because he doesn't even remember enough of her to be mad about her death."

And for someone who has spent each day of the last 6 years trying to fill in the shoes of her mother and experiencing her absence everyday, the idea of forgetting her mother is a ridiculous concept to her.

Her thoughts would have quickly derailed to: "He didn't love her enough to remember her."

In light of these thoughts, saying "Then you didn't love her the way I did" doesn't feel out of the blue.

No, I am definitely not justifying what she said, I'm just laying out a possible explanation to why she said what she said.

Yes, she should've apologized to Sokka for this and I think that they definitely should've had a long conversation about their mother's death and how it affected them. Between Katara supressing her feelings and Sokka supressing his memories, i don't think they ever had this conversation.

But sadly we are given neither of these scenes.

Tl;dr: Everytime Katara mentions her mother, it's with good reason and I don't think it's fair to call a character toxic when they lack a mind to mouth filter for 5 minutes and say some mean things. And considering all that Katara has done for everybody, it isn't fair at all.

Peace out!

[tenthgrove]

yess thank you for letting me ask you about the lore >:3c so I have to get my absolute favorites outta the way first— what kinda lore and thoughts do you have for sorbet or gelato ( <- before they get together and the earlier years of them getting together if you need a specific period ) I have to also ask are you ok if I go down the “line” and get your thoughts in other asks about the rest of the la squadra babes? Thank you sm 💖💖 I hope you’re having a wonderf day/evening

Ah! Now this is one of my absolute favourites! Apologies to anyone who has already heard me ramble about my Sorbet and Gelato backstory ad nauseam on multiple occasions, but this is really an area where I can't help myself. Besides, this is my opportunity to go more in depth where I haven't before:

(Note after writing this: It's stupidly long. I'm sorry I just can't help myself with these backstories. I couldn't decide what to leave out so I decided nothing.)

(Also please feel free to ask me more lore questions because I love doing this)

We'll begin with Sorbet, born in Naples in February 1967 if you follow the canon timeline (although by default I write in modern AU so move the dates 20 years later). His situation at birth was absolutely dire, the eldest child of an incredibly vulnerable woman and one of her clients as a sex worker. Sorbet's mother was by all means a decent woman but her severe mental illness and drug addiction made it impossible for her to be a good mother, which of course had a bad effect on Sorbet growing up. After Sorbet, she had 5 more children, all through clients, and Sorbet was saddled with much of their care.

Though he loved his siblings, Sorbet was pretty much done with this life by age 12 and was easily swept up by older boys from the local street gang, who paid him well to peddle drugs when he should have been in school. This was a very underfunded neighbourhood so nobody questioned his truancy, and within the next couple of years he had stopped going to school entirely. Shortly after this, having acquired sufficient money through his crime involvement, Sorbet left his family to stay with his new friends, moving between them on a regular basis. He also discovered his sexuality around this time and dated a few male friends, though none of these relationships got very far.

By age 16, Sorbet had earned a reputation in the street gang for skilled and passionate violence, and was selected by the ringleader to commit the group's first planned murder, in exchange of course for a lucrative reward. Sorbet accepted, succeeded, and became the group's de-facto assassin whenever needed. He continued to hoard considerable money for the remainder of his adolescence, though continued to be functionally homeless since he didn't see it necessary when sofa-surfing was suiting him fine.

Before resuming with Sorbet, let's explain the life that Gelato came from. Gelato was born in October 1967 in St. Petersburg, Russia, (Note- I previously used the city of Minsk, unaware that this is in fact, in Belarus) to an upper-middle class businessman and his Italian wife, a distant relative of French Monarchy. Gelato's relationship with his parents was rocky from the start due to the fact they would have preferred a girl after three successive sons, but any parental love they had for their youngest child broke down entirely after he was diagnosed with both Autism and ADHD at age 5, in an evaluation intending to find the cause of some behavioural issues that were really, just a response to emotional neglect.

When Gelato was 13 he, his parents, and two of his three brothers (the eldest was already an adult by this time and elected to stay behind) moved to Italy to escape some allegations of corruption in the father's business. They moved to a rural village in North-West Italy where the community was very middle-class and quite stifling for Gelato, who had enough social rules to remember in the familiar, economically-diverse city he grew up in. His behavioural issues got worse and began to include things he would later regret, such as attacking and stealing from younger children, and things he would absolutely not, like attacking and stealing from teachers. By this point the family had largely written him off as a failure, revering instead their academically successful, well-behaved older children, which absolutely contributed to the spiralling cycle of behaviour issues Gelato faced.

Then, at age 17, Gelato failed a crucial exam and was expelled from high-school. His parents kicked him out on the spot, and with no other family in Italy Gelato had very few options on what to do next. He recalled, however, one older friend having links to a street gang in Naples, and decided to see if this boy might have a route out of destitution for him. Indeed, the friend did know of a man in Naples needing assistance within the gang, but could offer no help in getting Gelato there. Seeing no other way, Gelato walked the whole journey.

Arriving in Naples, the friend's associate announced that the position Gelato was after had been taken, but taking pity on his distress, informed him of another friend who needed someone to look after an unlicensed bar that served as one of the group's main meeting points. He agreed to arrange for the small apartment above the bar to be given as payment.

Gelato accepted, but although he had now solved the problem of homelessness his life was still incredibly miserable. For one, with his pay being the apartment he had to rely on measly tips to get by, which rarely left him with enough to eat let alone anything else. Additionally, as an outsider with little understanding of the way gangs work Gelato was an easy target for abuse, and was treated like absolute shit by the bar's patrons.

By this point in time, Sorbet had just turned 18. He was, incidentally, in the same gang Gelato had joined, and a regular at the bar he worked in. For a good couple of months they took no notice of each other, until Sorbet came to be in a coincidental feud with one of the men who was violent to Gelato at the bar. When Gelato witnessed the two of them in a fight, he made the spur-of-the-moment decision to join in on Sorbet's side, knocking the patron unconscious and leaving him too afraid to visit again. For his trouble, Sorbet gave Gelato a portion of the money he looted from the fight's loser, and flirted with him lightly before going about with his evening. Unknown to Sorbet, he had just sent Gelato falling head over hills in love.

Gelato found out about Sorbet's sexuality from other patrons and, delighted, attempted to flirt with him the next time they saw each other, but his attempts came off very poorly and Sorbet actually thought he was being insulted. Angered, he dragged Gelato into the cellar to demand what was going on. Gelato, terrified, admitted having a crush, which Sorbet found to be the sweetest and most genuine thing he'd ever heard. While he couldn't promise a relationship, he did agree to show Gelato more attention in the future. But, it was only a matter of days until Sorbet found himself loving Gelato back.

This whirlwind relationship continued happily for three weeks, Sorbet greatly improving Gelato's situation through his saved money and helping him fend off the abusive patrons. Gelato, in turn, offered Sorbet a permanent place to stay in the apartment, which he accepted. Sorbet was in the process of moving his things, and they had plans to refurbish the place to make it actually habitable.

But then, everything came crashing down. One night the bar was subject to a surprise raid by the police, operating by the false assumption it was empty. Sorbet and Gelato attempted to flee but were caught, and in a panic, Gelato shot a policeman dead. Rushing to his defence Sorbet killed two more, but a fourth escaped to tell the tale. The couple knew they were screwed. Running to the headquarters of their gang they begged for protection but were informed the small group simply could not save them from a charge this serious, and gave them only a single night of shelter to plan their next move. Gelato, who remember had never committed anything more serious than minor ABH before, had an absolute breakdown over this predicament that night, and whilst comforting him, Sorbet devised a blood pact with him to stick together no matter what came.

Over the next few days, Sorbet and Gelato fled north, avoiding the police through Sorbet's skills as a criminal and Gelato's very convincing Russian tourist impression. They were almost at the French border when Sorbet awoke one night to find Gelato missing behind him. He chased his tracks to the driveway of a rural house, a tearful Gelato clutching a knife at the shut door and trembling. He informed Sorbet that he had intentionally led him to the village where his family lived, with the intention to break in and kill them as revenge for the years of abuse. Sorbet warned Gelato that this would not be good for their attempts to flee, but said he understood fully and would help him if this is truly what he wanted. Gelato agreed, and together they broke into the house and slaughtered Gelato's mother and father, additionally killing one of his brothers after he woke from the noise. The other brother, the youngest other than Gelato, was spared, as Gelato felt his role in the abuse had been comparatively more minor and he did not deserve to die. This of course, left another witness.

The massacre in the village was quickly linked to the one at the bar and Gelato was promptly identified from a comparison of DNA found at the scene to his surviving brother's. Sorbet, a known criminal, was identified soon after. Not only were the pair now known but the police figured out what their plan was and informed the French police as well, making things exponentially harder for the couple.

They made do for a while by hanging low and keeping on the move, living off money stolen from the parents' house. Eventually however, they needed more, and began making deals with local crime organisations to carry out assassinations in exchange for money or temporary shelter. While Sorbet was already a pro at this, Gelato found himself a fast learner, and soon realised he shared Sorbet's adoration for the act of killing. He felt as though he was finally coming to meet his true self.

Though the assassination deals were lucrative, they did not help the couple keep a low profile and the attacks from police were relentless. Several times, they barely escaped capture. All this was not good on their mental states, and after two years, Sorbet knew it needed to end. He and Gelato returned to Naples in the hope their old gang might reconsider protecting them, but they were met with a surprise as their old gang had been completely overtaken by Passione. Even still, the new mobsters had heard a lot about Sorbet and Gelato's exploits and agreed to get them an audience with a local Capo, Pericolo, who was impressed by the men's skills and moved by the sense of honour suggested by their love for each other. He agreed to initiate them into the gang.

Soon after this, Sorbet and Gelato recieved stands which, although not very powerful, assisted them greatly in the art of assassination. Soon, they were natural choices for Passione whenever a hit needed carrying out in the Naples area. At some point a few years in, they befriended a man named Prosciutto who had been recently forced into Passione due to his heritage. Prosciutto was also funnelled into assassination jobs and, with less of a reputation for impulsivity than Sorbet and Gelato, was the one given the order to form a new assassination squad when the need arose, around 1993 if we're following canon.

(Note, I hc La Squadra was created by Passione in response to a real life government crackdown on the Italian mafia around 1992-93, in response to an incredibly scandalous series of assassinations. In such a climate, it would make sense for Passione to want to consolidate an elite squad of its best hitmen, do avoid future problems.)

Due to personal commitments Prosciutto did not want to be the captain, so attempted to give this responsibility to Sorbet, a request the boss promptly denied. Prosciutto was, however, allowed to add Sorbet and Gelato to the team's ranks, cementing the three of them as the first members of the team.

Prosciutto would, soon enough, find another person to give the title of captain to, but that's a story for another time.